How Boys Speak

Dean Speaks: Attention Seekers

Sorry for the loooong wait! I am fully recovered now so updates should be weekly at least! Thanks for all the support, we really appreciate it!

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Dean Speaks: Attention Seekers, we all know one.

OMG, why are all these weird guys inviting me on Facebook?
WOW, my biceps are fucking huge!
So sick of my life! I can't believe he cheated on me!
Just banged 3 girls in the past two days, awwwh yeah!

Attention seekers are everywhere, whether on Facebook, text or in person, we all know one. It's almost as if they feed of the attention to survive. I don't care if you haven't had a fucking boyfriend for 3 months, Roger hasn't had a girlfriend for 20 something years, and he's sane. Okay well maybe not sane but he's physically healthy which is good enough.

Also, what is up with these teen guys who only talk about the gym? Hey, yeah I go to the gym but I don't broadcast it everywhere. Let's not even fucking talk about the sixteen year olds who are using steroids, they look like over sensitive large fucking bunnies with blue veins sticking out. Hey, does anyone else find bunnies fucking creepy?

So anyway, I know this girl named Amy who is a huge attention seeker and always wants to be involved in everybody's problem. One time, this girl's mother recently got diagnosed with Leukemia and everybody was comforting her. Suddenly, Amy just bursts into tears and claims how it was so hard for her (Amy) because her mother wasn't "there" for her when she was younger.

WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT? Why did she suddenly start talking about herself? Who does she think she is? How can you just not have a heart? Why does Roger's mother have a beard in the mornings?

And so one day, I called her as some guy named Bert and blurted out some random shit that wasn't even funny enough to post. The next day, Amy says she has a stalker called Bert who constantly phones her all the time! I just called one time and that was it. She now says she's actually thinking of getting protection because she's so "scared".

Nevertheless, we all actually decide to really stalk her and it becomes hilarious especially because she wants the attention so she hardly ever ends the call!

Hope you enjoy!

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By this stage, I've called Amy at least 20 times before so she kind of knows it's me and expects me to be "weird".

*Ring ring*

Amy: What now

Dean: Do you want to hear a scary story?

Amy: Fine...

Dean: So, there are four people in a car...

Amy: Uh?

Dean: And this girl's giving this dude some naughty.

Amy: Uhm okay.

Dean: And they die.

Amy: What?

Dean: That's it.

Amy: What was the point of that?

Dean: Don't you get it? You start to question whether they died or not. (I fucking made up shit)

Amy: I don't understand.

Dean: Oh my god!

Amy: Are you okay?!

Dean: I just came.

Amy: Eww, you are disgusting!

*Dead line*