How Boys Speak

Reece Speaks: Weird People on the Internet

Reece Speaks: Weird People on the Internet

I know, I know. When you first read the title you thought "What a hypocrite," considering I'm rather weird myself. However, I'm talking about the real weird perverts on the internet. Hey, I would be lying if I said that I've never flirted (wink wink) on the net but I haven't asked random girls to give me blowjobs on there as well. That's mainly because most hot, pretty girls on weird chat rooms are old men looking to pick up young boys... serious.

Let's talk Omegle

For those who haven't heard of www.omegle.com, it's basically a one-on-one chat room that pairs you up with random strangers.

I've been getting so many requests to go on Omegle from Wattpad users. I've been on Omegle a couple of times a few years back and trust me, back then it was so much better. There were hardly any weird ass guys asking anybody to show them a good pair of boobies. (Okay, so maybe I was one of them...)

Nowadays, even if you try going on Omegle to "troll" it sucks. 50% of the users there are trolls themselves and the rest are just sex addicts, so good luck.

Here are a few conversations I've had on the site.

You: Hey, what's up?
Stranger: ASLR
You: 21 m (location) white

Stranger has disconnected.

For a guy that's the typical conversation since the site has like 70% of male users, when they get paired up with vagina-less partners, they disconnect.

So I do what I normally do... I pretend to be a girl.

Stranger: Hey
You: Hi! <3
Stranger: How are you?
You: Great =) and you? =)
Stranger: Gud. Your aslr?
You: 18 f Canada White, and you? <3
Stranger: 27 m Aus white
You: Cooooooool <3
Stranger: So are you naughty or nice?
You: I'm nice =)
Stranger has disconnected.

And these types of conversations annoy me. Seriously, trolling on omegle was good in like 2008.

You: Hey, sup?
Stranger: I AM A FLUFFY RABBIT!!!!
You: Cool stuff.
Stranger: I LOVE JUSTIN BEIBER!
You: Okay
Stranger: HAHAHAHA LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL!!!!!!!!!
You: Fuck you.
You have disconnected.

Anyway, back to the story. So while I was browsing the online ads I see a guy posting a rather hilarious advert claiming to have a weird fetish.

If you want to check out the email I sent the guy, see the photos on our Facebook page at www.facebook.com/howboysthink

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Advert:

Breastfeeding

I'm an attractive swm (Single, white male) with average looks and above average body looking for a nurturing older woman to breastfeed me. I love to be held and cradled. Need a loving and tendering woman who enjoys sensual mothering and is large breasted. Please put "good" in subject box.

Basically after a few emails he gives me his number. I say that I'm a transsexual who takes hormones daily so I can produce milk. After I send him a few pictures of some average, manly woman with huge breasts, he finally gives him.

*Ring rinnng*

Larry: Hello?

Reece: Hey baby, this is Alex.

Larry: Wow, your voice sounds really deep. (I tried to go for this deep, gay kind of voice.)

Reece: Yeah, I like when things are deep, if you know what I'm saying.