Dec 5, 2016
In three months my mom will be coming our a prison a day after her birthday. I'm nervous and scared, but I am happy. I get to see my mom, when she comes out it will be 3 years since I've seen her. How am I suppose to react to that. She wants me to move out of Keno (Kenosha). But I don't know if I want to. But she wants it. I just follow orders from anyone, if they want something I usually give it to them. I never stop and ask what do I want..and frankly I have no idea what I want.
Pros of Moving...
1)*New Friends? But what if they don't like me...
2)*Be with my mom
3)*New book (life) to discover
4)*Honestly could die and nobody would even know....
5)*Peace?
6)*Happiness?
7)*Better grades?
8)*No stress?
9)*New Image..a better one...
10)*Gains something..?
11)*Mom is happy
12)*I'll be with my real mom.
~~ Then the Cons...
1) Farther from my brothers
2)More depression issues
3)Not finishing the book
4)No Gloria
5) No Chelsea
6)No Joe
7) No Tessa
8)No Violet
9)No Alyssa
10)No Sarahi
11)Nobody
12) New School
13)More Nightmares
14)More panic/anxiety attacks
15)Still has a fake smile
16) Cries every night
17) Shuts everyone out of my life
18) No more doing stupid crazy shit with my actual friends
19)Still stressed
20)Eating disorder worse
21) Giving up on everything
22)People forgetting me
23) I am not...Happy
I realize everything happens for a reason. Those people I names..are everything to me. And there are way more. Yeah I told You their names it gives you a closer view on who I am. Since some people are dying to know who this Anonymous Girl is.
All these things make it so hard to choose, from staying or going. I honestly don't know what to do. What if I leave and everyone here forgets about me. I thought all my life I was alone. But I really wasn't.
The people I am surrounded by are more like family to me...then my actual family. My brothers they were always there. I can't help but break into tears when I am around them or even talking to them on the phone.
I forgot what my moms voice sounds like...I am slowly forgetting what she looks like...is that bad? I am forgetting what my brothers look like too.
I wish I just instead of always having a fake smile on...I wish I could have that one person who would just let my cry and say something. But not that everything will be alright because it NOT!
Everything will not be alright. If I want to stay in Keno, I have all my friends but I lose disrespect towards my mom...my real mom...
But If I leave Keno, EVERYONE I know won't want anything to do with me...They will cut me off. And I don't think I can handle that...
~
For awhile..I'd have the same nightmare. My brothers would be playing in the front yard. I'd look away for a second, hearing gunshots... and when I look at them they'd both my on the ground blood surrounding them. A tan car speeding off. I would run to them, holding them crying. They'd mumble something I couldn't Understand and then they'd just say nothing more...they wouldn't even breath..They were dead in my arms... My Brothers I love very much..they are my everything and them dying..I'd go insane...I wouldn't know what to do with my life...
Honestly wish for once I knew what I wanted in
YOU ARE READING
Life Of Anonymous
RandomI am the anonymous girl. I tell the truth of the pain. This is how me the Anonymous girl feels. But is to afraid to tell it to people she knows. Even if some that might read this know who I am. But doesn't know it me. And I am getting closer to my l...
