Part 1
Customer Service Rep: Can you install LOVE?
Customer: I can do that.I'm not very technical, but I think I am ready to install now. What do I dofirst?
Customer Service Rep:The first step is to open your HEART. Have you located your HEART ma'am?
Customer: Yes I have,but there are several programs running right now. Is it okay to install whilethey are running?
Customer Service Rep:What programs are running ma'am?
Customer: Let me see...I have PASTHURT.EXE, LOWESTEEM.EXE, GRUDGE.EXE, and RESENTMENT.COM runningright now.
Customer Service Rep: Noproblem. LOVE will automatically erase PASTHURT.EXE from your current operatingsystem. It may remain in your permanent memory, but it will no longer disruptother programs. LOVE will eventually overwrite LOWESTEEM.EXE with a module ofits own called HIGHESTEEM.EXE. However, you have to completely turn offGRUDGE.EXE and RESENTMENT.COM. Those programs prevent LOVE from being properlyinstalled. Can you turn those off ma'am?
Customer: I don't knowhow to turn them off. Can you tell me how?
Customer Service Rep: Mypleasure. Go to your Start menu and invoke FORGIVENESS.EXE. Do this as manytimes as necessary until GRUDGE.EXE and RESENTMENT.COM have been completelyerased.
Customer: Okay, I'mdone. LOVE has started installing itself automatically. Is that normal?
Customer Service Rep:Yes it is. You should receive a message that says it will reinstall for thelife of your HEART. Do you see that message?
Customer: Yes I do. Isit completely installed?
Customer Service Rep:Yes, but remember that you have only the base program. You need to beginconnecting to other HEARTS in order to get the upgrades.
Part 2
Customer: Oops... I havean error message already. What should I do?
Customer Service Rep:What does the message say?
Customer: It says"ERROR 412 - PROGRAM DOES NOT RUN ON INTERNAL COMPONENTS". What doesthat mean?
Customer Service Rep:Don't worry ma'am, that's a common problem. It means that the LOVE program isset up to run on external HEARTS but has not yet been run on your HEART. It isone of those complicated programming things, but in non-technical terms itmeans you have to "LOVE" your own machine before It can"LOVE"others.
Customer: So what shouldI do?
Customer Service Rep:Can you find the directory called "SELF-ACCEPTANCE"?
Customer: Yes, I haveit.
Customer Service Rep:Excellent, you are getting good at this.
Customer: Thank you.
Customer Service Rep:You're welcome. Click on the following files and then copy them to the"MYHEART" directory: FORGIVESELF.DOC, SELFESTEEM.TXT,EALIZEWORTH.TXT, and GOODNESS.DOC. The system will overwrite any conflictingfiles and begin patching any faulty programming. Also, you need to deleteSELFCRITIC.EXE from all directories, and then empty your recycle bin afterwardsto make sure it is completely gone and never comes back.
Customer: Got it. Hey!My HEART is filling up with really neat files. SMILE.MPG is playing on mymonitor right now and it shows that WARMTH.COM, PEACE.EXE, and CONTENTMENT.COMare copying themselves all over my HEART!
Customer Service Rep:Then LOVE is installed and running. You should be able to handle it from here.One more thing before I go...
Customer: Yes?
Customer Service Rep:LOVE is freeware. Be sure to give it and its various modules to everybody youmeet. They will in turn share it with other people and they will return somereally neat modules back to you.
Customer: I will. Thankyou for your help.
