Still Queer As Folk

Episode 2

I grabbed Michael's hand and moved to sit on the couch. This is going to take a little time to explain.

I took a deep breath, how to start. "Ok, first the ring. Yes, Justin and I are married. We signed all the paper work and joined everything. The club, kinnetik, the loft, Britin and Justin's studio and apartment in New York are now ours as partners. He also had his name changed to Kinney before he returned to New York. Now, the reason I was so upset when he didn't come home to visit two months ago was because it was our one year anniversary..." Michael jumped up off the couch.

"A fucking year Brian. You married him a year ago and you never told me. What the fuck."

"No one knew, except Jennifer and my lawyer. We decided we didn't want to tell anyone until he came home to stay. We just didn't want the aggravation that came with everyone knowing just yet, while being apart. It was our choice, deal with it."

"Moving on to the night I took off from babylon. I got a phone call, from a detective of the NYPD. He informed me that the day Justin was coming home he was involved in a hit and run. It had taken them a week to Identify him and contact me."

I stood up and began to pace the floor. "They still don't know who hit him or why. Justin has been in a coma since. The doctor does not know what to expect, if he even wakes up, taking into consideration his previous brain damage. He broke a few ribs and his left leg. I decided a month ago to have him transferred to the hospital here. I needed to be here for work and I didn't want to be hours away if something happened." I finished and turned to look at Michael. He had tears in his eyes.

"Ok, first, you should have told me. I can't believe you have been going through all of this alone, for two months. Second, you Brian Kinney are married, holy shit, I can't process that right now. Except, it does explain why you haven't been taking anyone home with you. Last, why did you start crying before?"

I smiled, "Good news on one of his scans he had done today. The doctor thinks it may be a sign he may wake up soon."

"That's incredible. Do you mind if I come with you to see him." I shook my head and we walked out of the loft.

Michael has not said much in the car on the way to the hospital. I guess he is still processing all the shit I just threw at him. Don't care, Michael has always been a drama queen, he'll get over it.

I started thinking about everything before Justin left for New York. I know Justin was worried I was changing just to make him happy back then. Truth is, I started to change long before that, I just stopped fighting it after almost losing him again.

I always soften my hard edges when Sunshine and I were alone. The asshole was and is still there, I just no longer feel the need to fight my pull to him. I stopped fighting how much he means to me and started to show it more.

As far as the fucking around goes, I started to realize the problem with that back when he left me for the fiddler. I saw Justin in every man I brought home. He became the one I needed, even after being with someone after taking him back I still craved him. Of course once again I allowed my pride to get in the way when my status was threatened and started that damn sex game. There was also the issue of not being able to tell him how I felt, the words just would not come out. So I could not ask him to stay.

Fucking Liz knowing exactly what to say to me to get me to face my emotions, and deal. Even if I claimed Brandon's ass as prize for winning, the most important thing in my life would still be missing, Justin. The status ment nothing without him. He was the one person who would always see me despite my arrogance and pride as number one. He loved me, no matter my bull shit.

Finally making it to the hospital Michael and I head up to the ICU. "I assume you don't want me to tell anyone about any of this just yet." No, actually at this point I could careless. I am done letting my pride get in the way. I don't care what they think of me when they see me with him, and I am not going to treat him differently to
protect my pride. They can fuck off.