Regrets

Chapter Eleven

11.

And so here I am. Back in the fucking hospital. I can't believe this. I haven't even seen Vincent. Good or bad? My cuts are healing. I want them back.

They told me it was real. That the pain is real. That he's really gone.

And he is.

Colton is gone and there's nothing I can do about it.

I crave listening to music right now. I could go for a smoke. Or maybe just get drunk. If I pulled out these stupid fucking IV's I'd just pass away. But these damn doctors would try and save me.

Whats the point?

I'm honestly pissed. Pissed that "God" decided to take Colton and not me. Why? He did nothing wrong. I'm the one thats fucked up.

"Howdy." It's Vincent. And I thought he left me too.

"Hi." I mutter.

"How are you doing?" He places some flowers on the stand next to my bed.

"Fine." I bite my lip and look away.

We both know I'm not fine.

He chuckles. He puts one hand deep into his pocket and runs the other through his amazing hair. "I thought you were done... self harming..." he slips both hands in his pockets now.

I bite my lip harder. Did he want me to stop? Was he expecting me to?

"It's addicting... I've tried. It was the first time in months." I explained.

He looks close to tears. "As a doctor I value life. I... I want to help people. And I can't help you if you don't want help." He remarks.

"Well it isn't your job to help me. I've been to psychiatry. It doesn't help. And you yelling at me doesn't help either."

"I'm not yelling."

"Whats this about? We've known each other about 4 days and you're already sick of me? What the hell, Vincent. What the fuck do you want from me." My voice is slowly rising as I speak.

"I just want you to be happy."

"Well then you're out of fucking luck, okay?!" I scream.

He takes his hands out of his pockets and picks up the flowers and throws them across the room. "Dammit Taylor! Just try to be happy! Life has meaning and you have meaning so open you're childish fucking eyes!" And he walks out.

He must be a horrible doctor.

I put my hand over my eyes and try to stop my head from throbbing. It isn't long before I call in the nurse and ask for aspirin.

"Everything alright, Miss?" She asks. It isn't my old nurse.

"Fine." I spit out and take my pills before falling asleep.

*Taylor's dream*

I'm running. And running. And running. I feel terrified. The sound of my feet hitting the ground aren't the only thing I hear anymore.

There are bigger footsteps. Louder panting and deep growling.

I run faster. Five years of track really pay off. Now I'm being grabbed around the ankle. I look down and a tree root is tangling me up. I'm on the ground now, being pulled towards a big black figure. I'm screaming and thrashing around.

The figure places itself on top of me and pins my arms above my head.

"Colton?" I gasp.

He bares his fangs at me. Fangs? What?