Regrets

Chapter Seventeen

17.

I wake up in the new apartment. Everything's unpacked but it isn't very tidy. With Vincent at work, I get to cleaning.

I'm putting away the clean laundry as I hear Vincent's phone ring.

I don't want to answer it, he might think I'm being nosy, but since the number is unrecognized it must not be anyone he knows.

"Hello?"

"Oh... uhm... who is this?" A women's voice asks shakily.

"I should be asking you."

"Right. My apologies. I'm Jenna Montgomery, Vincent's intern."

My mouth forms an "O" shape and I'm suddenly very worried.

"Why are you calling?"

"I'm sorry, but first I need to know who I'm speaking to."

"I'm Taylor, Vincent's girlfriend."

I hear Jenna sigh and then she says, "Vincent needs to report to work in an hour or I'm afraid he's going to be fired. This is out of my hands unfortunately so please get into contact with him."

"Wait, Vincent isn't at work?" I glance nervously at the clock, it's past noon, Vincent's shift started four hours ago.

"No, I'm sorry. I really shouldn't be telling you this, but Vincent hasn't been at work at all the past week. Many patients are in need of surgery. He's just started his job here, I don't suggest he gets himself fired already. It'll put a damper on his reputation."

"Right, right... I'll tell him. Is there any way he can come in tomorrow?"

"I'm afraid not. He either comes in today or not at all." Then Jenna hangs up.

I set Vincent's phone down and sit with my head in my hands.

My curiosity gets the best of me and I start going through Vincent's text messages.

Only one of the conversations catch my eye, it seems he's been talking to a women named Claire.

As I scroll through the messages, there's nothing that counts as cheating, but he's been seeing her everyday this week.

Almost in tears I put the phone down and lay on the bed.

I don't know if I'm going to confront him about it, but I really have no choice.

I stand up and walk over to my dresser. Pulling open the top drawer, I take out a little mint candy box. I let out the breath I didn't realize I was holding and basically run to the bathroom, slamming the door behind me. The door frame shakes and I'm sure the apartment underneath heard my start of a tantrum.

I turn on the hot water and undress. I step on a scale. I've lost about fifteen pounds since the last time I've weighed myself. I turn to the box and open it slowly, seeing the tiny pieces of metal glimmer in the bright light.

Steam is engulfing me and my thoughts as I slide to the floor of shower and put the blade to my leg.

I squeeze my eyes shut and push down, dragging it across my skin.

How could he do this to me?

Another cut.

I really am worthless. Especially to him. How I could I have thought he loved me?

Another cut.

I start forming the word "broken."

The blood flows from the slits and I look at the art. I stare at the bloody blade and press it to my wrist next. I start at the very tip of the vein and cut vertically.