Insert Idiotic Title Here

Chapter Six

A/N: HAI I'M SO SORRY I HAVEN'T BEEN UPDATING OMG! BUT THIS CHAPTER IS GOING TO MAKE UP FOR IT BECAUSE THEY ARE GONNA GO ON A BEAUTIFUL DATE AND THEY WILL BECOME YOUR OTP IF NOT YOU'LL DIE IN YOUR SLEEP OKAY BYE!

Mystery Person's POV (CUZ IT'S NOT OBVIOUS)

"OMG I'M SO NERVOUS, BABY!" I squealed into the phone. "I'VE NEVER HAD A BF BEFORE!"

"YOU ARE A BEAUTIFUL PERSON! YOU ARE A QUEEN!" she reassured me. She always knew how to make me feel beautiful!

"NO, YOU ARE!"

"YOU!"

"YOU!"

"YOU!"

"YOU!"

"I SAID YOU!" she screamed. I almost dropped my phone into the sink! I was in the bathroom, getting all dolled up for...teehee...HIM! I've loved the guy for such a long time, and I just figured it out! I find that so beautiful...

"I'm sorry, it's just that I'm getting ready for MY date too and I'm really nervous...we're going to enjoy some hors d'oeuvres at this fancy new place called The Stuffed 'N' Stuffy Bra. ALL OF THE RICH GIRLS GO! AAAAAAAHHHH!"

I looked up the restaurant and became instantly worried...

"Er, no offense babe-none to you or that gorgeous hunk of man you'll be spending the evening with-but how are either of you supposed to pay?" Of COURSE I love her to death; she's one of my BEST FRIENDS...she's just super poor, as is her date.

"Don't know, don't care! I expect him to pay for everything!"

"Uh...didn't he like just stop being a scumbag to you?" I asked.

"Ya, why?" came the response. I sighed.

"Nothing, nothing," I muttered, trying to hide my exasperation--once again, I love her, but...she could be clueless. "I'm just not sure how reliable he is, that's all."

"OMG YOU DON'T TRUST MY BF?!" she yelled.

"N-no! I-I do, but-"

"YOU'RE SO CONTROLLING!"

"OMG, THAT'S IT! I GET THAT YOU'RE NERVOUS, I AM TOO! BUT IT'S NOT LIKE THIS IS THE FIRST TIME THAT ABSOLUTELY EVERYTHING HAS TO BE ABOUT MARY SUE!"

"I'M THE PROTAGONIST!"

"SO WHAT?! IF YOU EVER READ YOU WOULD KNOW PLENTY OF SELFLESS PROTAGONISTS!" After a long moment she spent trying to find an argument, she hung up!

I took a deep breath and looked in the mirror. "Screw Mary Sue! You're fabulous, Bob! You will have a great evening at the pet store with Surfer Simon!"

REAL A/N: BOB IS FABULOUS, OKAY?! Also, as you can see, HE DOESN'T NEED MARY SUE! HE IS A SMART AND BEAUTIFUL GUY WITH A GREAT NEW RELATIONSHIP! I ASSURE YOU, HE AND SURFER SIMON WILL WORK! NEXT UP, I'LL WRITE THE GLORIOUS EPILOGUE!