Alone

Chapter 18

I was at the point where I was getting chest pains, Clarissa was getting what she exactly wanted. Myself suffering from a slow and painful death, then she could grasp her claws around Alex. I've lost track of time of how long I was sitting at the bench, but that didn't matter. I counted at least twenty times that a mom pushing her kid in a stroller went around the track. Oh how I wish I could trade places with that child and let me have a mom again. The park started to empty out slowly as grey clouds began to take over the sun, a gust of wind swept over me; letting itself known that a storm was coming.

I sat in there in the pouring down rain on my bench and it felt like my life was moving in slow motion. I wish could live a life through someone else's eyes instead of my own. Though there is some odd reason that I'm still stuck here, not matter how much I have tried killing myself lately, it doesn't work. I stood up and my head started to pound falling to my knees. I heard the angels voices, ringing and ringing. Were they finally bringing me home?

I woke up and was struck with sadness knowing that I wasn't in heaven. Some how I got home and was in my own bed, not remembering how I got back. My grandma poked her head into my room and asked if I was doing okay and I answered back in a confused manner. She said I walked back home and passed out as I went up the stairs, which would be the cause of my aching head. I pulled the blanket back over my head and let out a sigh, oh what I'd do to turn this blanket into Alex. Wanting more than anything in the world for me to wrapped in his arms.

I fell asleep again and the vibration from my phone woke me up, my heart began beating fast hoping it was Alex. It was only Sage.

"Hello?" I mumbled.

"Hey girl hey," Sage cheered!

"What's up?"

"I wanted to see how you were feeling."

"Fine I guess."

"Don't lie to me girl."

I took a moment before speaking again and rolled onto my back.

"I'm not fine Sage, it feels like my heart has been ripped out, played with, and then put back in."

"Anything I can do?"

"There's nothing you or I can do, Alex wants Clarissa, clearly," I moaned.

"Well we just gotta not let her take him away from you."

"Like I said there's nothing I or we can do anymore."

"Yes there is and I'll be at your house in five minutes so be ready!"

She hung up and rolled myself out bed, zombie shuffling over to the dresser to put on fresh clothes. Sage was here within five minutes and I told my grandparents I was going out with her. She was jamming away to the music in her car as I got in the passenger seat.

"So what are we doing? I asked.

"I'm taking you on a makeover shopping spree!" She squealed," We're getting your man back!"

I sunk into my seat at the thought of shopping, something I never enjoyed and Sage noticed that. She turned up the radio and Taylor Swift's Welcome To New York song came on.

"Welcome to New York its been waiting for you welcome to New York Welcome to New York!" Sage sung along.

"I take it you like this song?" I laughed.

"Oh I do, the lights are so bright but they never blind me!"

I looked out the window tuning out the music, watching the lines from the telephone poles move up and down as if they heard the music and decided to dance along.

"You and I should take a trip to New York someday!"

"Wait what," I said coming back to reality.

"You, me and the big apple!" She smiled," How does that sound?"

"I'm not one for cities."

"Oh come on Bandit, cheer up!"

"Its kind of hard to."

"Well not for long it won't be."

We finally pulled into the parking lot and found a space. Sage pulled out her mini mirror playing at her hair and put on a fresh coat of lip stick. While there was me looking like I just rolled out of bed after months had gone by. She took my hand led me all the way inside and into this big fancy store. I looked through a rack of shirts and nothing came to my interest. This just wasn't my style. Sage poked me on the shoulder and I turned around, in her hands she held up a light yellow knee length dress with lace shoulders. It was pretty and I actually liked it.

I stared at myself in the mirror while I had this dress on tracing my fingers across my collar bones and then down to my hips, hoping that this could bring Alex back. I was at the point where I'd do anything and I'm glad Sage could help. She paid for my dress and then went to this little jewelry boutique right across from the store we were at. My mouth dropped at all the beautiful necklaces and bracelets, it was going to be hard to pick one.

"How about this one?" Sage held up a small pearl necklace.

"Its alright, kind of grandma-ish though."

"It would look totally adorable with your dress!"

"Well, hold onto and lets keep looking," I said sorting through bins of clearance items," I'll get it if I can't find anything else."

We left the store and I ended up getting the pearl necklace, Sage said vintage accessories is popular nowadays. There wasn't much to do at the mall so we sat next to the fountain in the middle. Sage's head perked up and taking my hand to lead me over to this salon. I tried to break free as the thought of going into the salon terrified me. I had always done my own hair or makeup for as long as I can remember. A tall lady stood at the front counter with a big smile and asked what she could do for us. Sage explained what we were doing and the lady's smile grew bigger saying she had the perfect person who could help us. Another girl took me to her area and sat me down in her chair, she put the black cape around me and pumped up the chair. I told her I do not want my hair cut, but she can style it for me and not too extreme makeup, I didn't want to look like barbie. 

I lost track of the time and she finally spun me around to face the mirror, I almost didn't recognize myself. She had given me long beach wavy curls, a light smokey eye for makeup and red lips. Sage was screeching and jumping for joy. For once I was happy with how I looked, I didn't look sad or sickly, I looked beautiful. Sage paid for the make over as well and we left the salon. She took me back to the fountain and told me to give her my phone, she told me to pose and Sage started taking pictures. I got my phone back and looked at the pictures, I was amazed for a moment I completely forgot about all the bad things and Clarissa. School tomorrow couldn't come fast enough, I was ready to take on the world.