Chapter 17
As soon as Cry fell asleep I got up and went to bathroom to clean my face. As I was done I reached for my makeup but then stopped. There’s no reason. I look awful anyway. But looking at my reflection in the mirror, I realized that I probably should so something. The bags under my eyes were too disturbing. I mean… I haven’t slept in like a week. Maybe more. I made it look a little bit better and put my glasses back. In the way to my room I grabbed few energy drinks. It was like only 10PM so I checked through my contacts on Skype. I sipped the energy drink and as I put it down someone messaged me.
Sioux: Hi.
Cat: Hey. Doing something important?
Sioux: Not really. What are you up to?
Cat: I was wondering if you wanted to talk instead of writing? Might be easier.
Sioux: Why not. I’ll just quickly get done some things.
Cat: Mkay.
I sat back and waited for him to call.
Skype didn’t have to ring twice. When the box popped up I immediately clicked to answer.
“Hi.” Snake greeted and I nodded.
“Hey, Snakey.”
“How are you?” he asked all serious.
“I’m fine.” Not.
“Bullshit.” He said angrily making me sigh.
“Broken. Useless. Alone. Confused. Scared. Empty. About to break down…”
“That’s better.” He stated and I giggled. It felt so weird laughing. All the nightmares and the message from HER made me feel scared again. It made me be like before again – not really talking and don’t even mention laughing. But being with Snake I felt safe. I don’t know why I trusted him so much.
“But it’s gonna be ok. I promise.” I whispered.
“You know I don’t believe you, right?”
“Well, I don’t give a shit, y’know?” I chuckled again and I stuck my tongue out even though he couldn’t see that. Fucker. I sipped from my ‘Monster’ drink.
“What are you drinking?” Snake asked worried.
“Just an energy drink.” I sipped some more.
“I don’t believe you.” He pointed out.
“You just want a reason for me to turn on my facecam, don’t you?” I smirked and sat back drinking more.
“I just want to know if we can drink together. I have a beer too.” He defended himself. Yea of course.
“Well, I have few in the fridge. I could go get them.” I stood up and danced out and then back with a box of bottles in hands. “Let’s get drunk!” I shouted and emptied first bottle in one take in the way turning on my facecam for him to see it.
“Sarah, slow down.” He let out and started his first one too.
After few beers I started to feel a bit dizzy.
And after few more I was crying and telling Snake the story about HER.
"I was... I was editing a video for YouTube and suddenly I got a text message on my phone... It was from my.. my mother." I sobbed and wiped away some tears. "Let me tell you a story..." I took a sip from my drink and continued.. "I was fourteen at the time. My mother and dad were fighting again. My dad had been drinking lately and she was pissed. You see, my mother is quite aggressive woman. She had punched him a few times but it never got that far as that night..." I muffled my sob. "It was late at night and I was up studying for test next day and I some-why decided to go get a drink even though I knew they were fighting. I walked in the kitchen and saw my mother grab the biggest knife we owned and cut my dad across the face. He was drunk so he wasn't strong enough to defend himself so he just fell on the floor and covered his face with his hands. I just stared. I just stared how my mother killed my dad! I didn't save him. I didn't do anything! I was a little coward.. and watched how she killed him. Then that one word escaped my lips. Dad... And you don't even know how scared I was when she looked at me with the most terrifying smile on. She beat me up. I almost died too. I actually wouldn't be sad if she killed me because my life after that was total shit. My friends left me and I was bullied. But I was too weak to kill myself. And here I am.. Being a total failure.
"You're not." Snake put in but I didn't bother to say otherwise.
"And then she texted me. Saying that she knows where I am. That she'll kill me... I can't sleep now because I'm too scared to wake up to see her standing there, just staring at me. It's hard to speak because I was almost killed when I speaked that day. It hard to laugh remebering all the shit I had to live with before."
I wiped away the tears and finished my beer.
And suddenly I felt warm arms wrap around me...
Cry.
-*-*-*-*-
Hey...
How are you?... I'm ok, thanks.
This week was great. Yeah.
Mm.. and Arta! You better be at school Monday because I'll slap you if y-- I mean.. You're beautiful... >_>..
No seriously.. get better soon, darling. ily.
I love you all..
Kittyface.
Kbye.
-Cathy
