Saviors

30

   When they got back from lunch, Jihoon took a nap because he was mentally and physically drained. As soon as his head hit the pillow, he was asleep. That was strange, normally he would be unable to sleep for a while, for his mind would be rushing with all kinds of strange thoughts. Thoughts of his past, his current situation, thoughts of death, like his sister's or grandmother's. But, given his current circumstances, it made sense that he should fall asleep immediately.

   The members sat in the living room to discuss their next steps. Soonyoung sat on the couch and stretched, a warm feeling spreading across his body. He suddenly frowned and rested his chin on his palm. What do Jihoon's actions mean? What thoughts are running through his head? He sighed. Why is he so confusing?

"So, the question is, what next?" Seungcheol started. The members looked thoughtful. "The question was always, 'how can we get him to wake up out of the state he is in?' We never thought about what we would do after that."

"Counseling?"

"Obviously. But what should we do? Continue practicing?" Jeonghan asked.

"Makes sense... We should take Jihoon to counseling then continue to practice. He can practice too, when ever he isn't at counseling." Seungcheol decided. He sighed. "It will be weird, going straight back to our backbreaking schedule after such a long time." He murmured absentmindedly. The members nodded.

"This just feels strange, to talk about practicing, when Jihoon has been our main priority these past couple of weeks." Jisoo agreed. Some of the members sighed and rubbed their eyes.

   The rest of the day was rather uneventful for the rest of the members but Jihoon spent it worrying about whether or not to tell them everything in the evening. He had this unsettled feeling in his stomach, but thankfully it wasn't as bad as when he was sick. Jihoon didn't think he would actually puke. He was pacing back and forth in his room when Minghao came in.

   "Hyung, it's time for dinner." Jihoon nodded and followed Minghao out of the room. "If you want to do it tonight, afterwards is probably the best time."

   "Thank you." He said quietly. Minghao nodded and put his hand on Jihoon's back for just a second, before letting it fall away.

   All throughout dinner, Jihoon nervously tapped his foot under the table. At least that meant that he was acting like normal. His members were actually relieved that he was acting that way. It beat Jihoon staring blankly at his food any day. It also meant that he was continuing on with his plan with Minghao, the one that made him so nervous the day of the 'incident'. And that meant he was going to tell them something.

   Jihoon had barely taken three bites before he couldn't eat anymore. He began doubting himself. Is this really the right decision? The members noticed his strange behavior and observed worriedly.

   "Jihoon... you should try to eat some more." Jisoo urged. Jihoon shook his head.

   "I can't."

   "Why not?"

   "I'm..." he trailed off, looking to Minghao to help.

   "He's nervous."

   "Why?" Jihoon's throat felt dry.

   "Because I'm telling everyone everything." He whispered. The members stared at him in shock.

   "Really? That's great!" Seungcheol exclaimed.

   "Why are you nervous Hyung?" Chan asked quietly. Jihoon's throat was dry and scratchy so he took a big drink before he answered. Once his throat wasn't as sore, he spoke.

   "I'm... nervous about how you will all react." There. He said it. It was out.

   "Do you think we'll react badly?" I'm almost 98% sure you'll react badly.

   "We'll see." His voice was nonchalant, his face impassive. But on the inside he once again felt like he was going to puke. Minghao squeezed his hand reassuringly under the table. Jihoon closed his eyes and looked down, as if in prayer or mentally preparing himself. "After we clean up, I'll... I'll talk." He said hesitantly, his eyes squeezed shut. The members looked at each other in surprise.

"We don't want you to push yourself, so if you need to, you could put it off till later." Jeonghan assured.

"Hyung~" Vernon whined, giving him a look.

"No, it's fine," Jihoon took a deep breath in order to calm his rattled nerves. "I owe this to you guys." Each word that came out of his mouth looked like it pained him to say.

"If you're sure..." Jihoon nodded, a pained expression on his face.

"Yes. I need to do this." The members looked unsettled at his resolve.

Jihoon started to help with washing the dishes at first, but they made him sit down after he dropped some of the chopsticks and almost dropped a plate. Seungcheol looked at him worriedly. He kept on asking if Jihoon was sure, and if he was okay. To both questions, Jihoon said yes. However, his heart was pounding. And not just because Soonyoung was next to him. How was he going to start? How was he going to tell them? What would he say? Would he leave anything out? How would they react?

Jihoon almost felt on the verge of a panic attack and he started breathing heavily. Soonyoung wrapped his arm around Jihoon's shaking shoulders out of habit. A wave of calm spread over Jihoon, and for a moment, he actually thought that it would be alright. But just for a moment. As soon as Soonyoung let go of Jihoon's shoulders, he began to shake again. Soonyoung put his arm back over Jihoon's shoulders, in order to calm him while they waited for everyone to finish cleaning up.

"So~, Soonyoung Hyung," Mingyu said slyly. "I heard that every time Jihoon Hyung would cry at night, you would climb down from your bunk to comfort him. Am I right?" Mingyu had a small smirk on his face as he looked at Soonyoung's arm that was thrown casually but protectively over Jihoon's shoulders. "You look used to skinship with Soonyoung Hyung, Jihoon Hyung." Jihoon blushed and looked away. Soonyoung blushed as well.

"Oh? And how did you manage to find that out Mingyu? Do I need to be worried about our safety? Should I install locks on all of our doors?" Soonyoung asked, flustered. He was obviously trying to play it off but it wasn't working out so well. Mingyu smiled, obviously enjoying making his Hyung so flustered.

"I have my sources." The rest of the members joined them from the kitchen and Mingyu fell quiet. Jihoon nervously rubbed his sweaty palms on his pants.

"W-where should I start?" He asked.

"The beginning."

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Sor-ry, but you'll have to wait till next time! Hope you all enjoyed reading.😁