Saviors

35

Now that he had made up with Soonyoung, he was back to sleeping in his own bed. It was the last day they had before they had to go back to practice, and everyone wanted Jihoon to be comfortable.

   Jihoon was jittery. He always got like that when he didn't do something for a while, if he took too big of a break. He had to keep himself busy or else his mind would wander to places he didn't want it to wander to. He couldn't focus on anything until he got back into his routine. Routines were safe. Routines kept him safe. Safe from himself.

   "Jihoon. Jihoon!" He jumped and the metal chopsticks slipped out of his hands. They clattered down loudly on his plate and he winced at the harsh sound.

   "Mianhey." He muttered. Seungcheol looked at him worriedly.

   "What's wrong? Are you okay?"

   "Yeah, I just... can't wait until I get back to practice." Jihoon picked his chopsticks back up.

   "Oh yeah, about that..." Seungcheol looked at Jeonghan worriedly.

   "What, are you going to make me stay back for a while or something? I understand why you would, but I would prefer to get back to my routine." He said politely.

   "No... its not that..." Seungcheol hesitated again, making Jeonghan sigh exasperatedly.

   "We want you to try counceling." Jihoon's chopsticks once again slipped out of his hands. The look in his face must've shown complete terror, because Jeonghan held up his hands. "Just hear us out."

   "With this, you'll get better faster. We're kind of worried about you Jihoon. Even before your sister died."

   "It was near impossible for me to tell you guys everything. And now you want me to tell a complete stranger? Was my past so insignificant to you that you think I can just tell it to anyone?! Do you know how much it took out of me? I thought that it was okay to tell you guys because I trust you and I know you." Jihoon shook his head, his mouth pressed into a firm line. He got up and cleaned his plate. Seungcheol sighed. All the other members looked at each other nervously.

   "We know. We know. It was just a suggestion. We won't make you do anything. All you need is time." Jihoon sighed quietly in relief. He didn't want to be mad at them. Being mad made everything worse.

   "What I need is my routine back." He said quietly, his back to them. Jihoon walked out of the room.

~

   "Do you really think he'll get better without a therapist?" Wonwoo whispered once Jihoon was out of the kitchen. Seungcheol looked out of the corner of his eyes at Soonyoung.

   "If we're here for him, then yes." If you're here for him Soonyoung. Make him know he's loved. Almost as if Soonyoung heard Seungcheol's thoughts, he walked out of the room after Jihoon.

~

The members cleaned the dorm for two hours before their manager came in to talk to them about their plan. Apparently, since they had taken about a four week break, it would be too difficult to have a comeback when they were planning, so it would be pushed back a month.

Jihoon was sweeping his room when the manager came into the dorm, so he didn't see the looks the other members gave the manager when he walked in. They were practically glaring. Their manager looked at them in confusion.

"What is it? Do I do something wrong?" He joked.

"You should've paid-" Vernon began. Jeonghan, one of the few who wasn't glowering at the manager so strongly, quickly put his hand over Vernon's mouth.

"Jihoon told us everything a couple days ago."

"Oh. Then I suppose you know now. He's fine?"

"Yeah, he's okay now."

"So how do you guys feel knowing that Jihoon only became a trainee because he needed the money?" Their manager asked with a slight smirk. He leaned against the wall and crossed his arms over his chest. Jeonghan frowned at this.

"It doesn't matter to us his reason. Why should we care? Plus, he said that he grew to enjoy it. Are you trying to turn us against each other or something? Because we'll never leave Jihoon's side."

"But aren't you afraid of him leaving your side? Now that his grandmother is dead, he has no real reason to continue being an idol."

"Did you not hear me? I said that he told us that he began to enjoy it. 'It' being what he does. Working, dancing, singing, performing." Jeonghan practically growled at their manager.

"I think you've overstaid your welcome. You may leave now." Seungcheol spat icily. Whoever wasn't glaring at first, now also had a murderous look in their eyes. Their manager rolled his eyes, but his shoulders were tense. He walked out slowly and they shut the door firmly behind him.

"We should talk to Pledis about him." Wonwoo said while staring at the door they just closed.

"I agree Hyung. He needs to either go, or get a stern lecture." Vernon snarled. Seungcheol tousled the younger boy's hair, half of a smile on his face.

The members of Seventeen had takeout for lunch, and everyone kept on giving Jihoon a bite of their meal. It showed that they worried about him not getting enough food. Since they offered it so kindly to him, even Seungkwan, he couldn't refuse. Jihoon ended up eating the largest lunch out of all of them.

Afterwards, Jihoon laid on the light brown hardwood floor, one hand over his stomach. He groaned and rolled over onto his stomach.

"I think I ate too much food." He mumbled into the floor. The members laughed.

"Hmm, still skinny, I think you need to eat some more." Jun said, poking his protruding ribs.

"No, no more food. I can't." Once again, the members laughed.

"We should go outside, burn off some of the food we ate. Otherwise, we'll never get Jihoon to eat dinner." Seungcheol stood up and brushed crumbs off his pants. Jeonghan raised his hand up to Seungcheol.

"Help me up. I can't move." With a grunt, Seungcheol pulled Jeonghan into a standing position.

"Yeah, we should definitely work off some of the food we ate." Jeonghan slapped his arms lightly and gasped. Jihoon smiled then frowned, thinking deeply.

After spending a chilly hour outside walking around aimlessly, Seventeen went back to their now clean dorm. Mingyu sighed and flopped down on top of Wonwoo on the couch as soon as he came in.

"I don't want to go back to practice tomorrow Hyung." He whined. Wonwoo chuckled and patted Mingyu's shoulder. Jihoon looked at them curiously then looked around at some of the other members. Most of them were talking and joking with each other. Having fun. Jihoon suddenly felt an emptiness in his soul. Frowning, he returned to his room.