Jihoon stretched, sore from sitting in the same position for the entire time. He checked the time on his phone. 2:27. He had gotten quite a bit done that night and decided to walk home. He turned of his phone and stuffed it into the pocket of his hoodie. Jihoon packed up his things then left the tiny room. The practice room looked eerie with the lights off and no one practicing. His footsteps echoed quietly in the empty room.
Jihoon left the Pledis building and began walking home in the chilly night air. He walked fast, head down, eyes on his feet. Never once looking up. He passed no one on the streets, and for that, he was relieved. He finally made it to the familiar house he was staying in with his members. He pushed open the door to reveal a pitch black room that he found his way through from memory. He was used to coming home to darkness.
Jihoon cleaned up and walked as silently as he could into his shared room. He slipped under the covers and tried in vain to fall asleep, but he couldn't. That too, was normal. Sighing, he slipped out of his bed and walked into the kitchen were he got himself some water and moved to sit on the couch in the living room. He sat on the very end and felt his hand brush something in the darkness. He jumped a little, eyes wide, hand clutched to his speeding heart. He listened carefully and heard breathing. This is not normal. Wind blew in from an open window, moving the curtains. Weak moonlight shone on the mystery person that was sleeping on the couch.
"Soonyoung Hyung?" Jihoon whispered. The figure shifted and groaned. Jihoon lightly shook his shoulder. Soonyoung immediately sat up, mumbling gibberish. His slanted eyes finally focused on Jihoon.
"A shoot! I fell asleep." He mumbled angrily.
"What were you doing?" Jihoon kept his voice low, not wanting to wake the other members.
"I was waiting for you." Soonyoung said innocently.
"Why?"
"I wanted to make sure you got home alright."
"Y-you didn't need to do that."
"But I wanted to." Soonyoung said cutely.
"But... why?" Jihoon asked, still confused. Soonyoung shrugged. "You should go to bed."
"So should you." Soonyoung countered.
"I-I can't sleep." Jihoon blushed, confused as to what Soonyoung was doing. Soonyoung sat up and stretched. He glanced at Jihoon.
"Why?"
"Why what."
"Why can't you sleep?" Jihoon looked down and grabbed his glass of water. Taking a sip, he shrugged, avoiding Soonyoung's eyes. "Can you not sleep often?" Again, he shrugged. "Jihoon, answer my question." Soonyoung sounded a bit angry. He leaned toward Jihoon and looked at him with a serious expression in his eyes. Soonyoung set his hand on Jihoon's knee, making the younger boy jump a little. Water sloshed out of his cup that he held in pale shaking hands.
"It's none of your business." He mumbled. Jihoon pushed off Soonyoung's hand and rushed out of the room, forgetting for once to be quiet. Soonyoung stared at his back sadly before following him into their bedroom.
Jihoon layed curled up under his blankets with wide eyes and a racing heart. What would be so bad about telling them? A tiny voice in his head whispered. I can't. They'd be disgusted and hate me. It's better this way. Jihoon thought. Not even telling them about your night terrors? They could help you, you know. The tiny voice argued. More knowledge leads to more questions. And with that, Jihoon fell into a fitful sleep.
A quiet beeping broke the smothering softness of sleep. Jihoon's whole body groaned in protest as he sat up and climbed out of his bed. He turned off the alarm and grabbed some clean clothes. He walked into the bathroom where he quickly showered and dressed. Jihoon walked back into his room to drop off his dirty clothes and met Soonyoung's eyes. He quickly looked away.
"Jihoon-" Soonyoung started softly. Jihoon walked out before he could say anything else.
Once again, he joined a sleepy Mingyu and Jun in the kitchen. They greeted him as usual but he said nothing. He normally would have felt terrible for ignoring his members but he was too deep in his thoughts to pay them much notice. Mingyu said something to him but it was like he was deaf. He only saw his lips moving with no sound. Mingyu gave up on speaking and just waved an apple in front of Jihoon. Without looking at him, Jihoon waved his hand away.
Soonyoung shuffled into the room and yawned. He saw Jihoon sitting, with his back to him, at the table. Mingyu was trying to get him to eat an apple.
"What's going on?" He asked Jun.
"Jihoon won't say anything. He won't even look at us." Jun replied sadly. Is this my fault? I shouldn't have pried. Soonyoung thought.
"He's never said much in the first place. How much do we actually know about him?" Soonyoung mumbled sadly into Jun's ear. Jun nodded in agreement. "I think this is because of me. I pried when I shouldn't have." Jun looked at him in surprise.
"Why? When?" Soonyoung pulled Jun out of the kitchen, not wanting Jihoon to overhear them talking about him.
"Last night, I waited up for him. When he came home, he practically sat on me by accident. I asked him why he wasn't in bed and he said he couldn't sleep. I asked him if he couldn't sleep often and why he couldn't. He didn't answer me. I got a bit serious and pressured him a bit. He ran off, saying it was none of my business." Soonyoung leaned away from Jun's ear to see his reaction. He looked shocked.
"I'll talk to Seungcheol Hyung about this. We will never be a team if we aren't close, and I think that we could all get a bit closer to Jihoon. Learn more about him. Sometimes he seems kind of lonely. It worries me that he doesn't feel close enough to tell us if anything is wrong." Jun said after a while. They glanced back into the kitchen where Mingyu was inspecting Jihoon like a doctor.
Jihoon looked up, finally noticing the boy in front of him. He got more and more annoyed as Mingyu circled him, poking him and waving his hand in front of Jihoon's face. He slapped his hand away right as Soonyoung and Jun walked back into the kitchen. The three of them stared at Jihoon in shock, he was never one to raise a hand to one of the members. Then again, he mainly isolated himself from the others. Jihoon backed off the stool, terror rising like bile in his throat. Now I've made them hate me. He backed out of the room, his eyes wide. What did I do? He ran out of the house and sprinted all the way to the Pledis building where he didn't bother to stop running, didn't bother signing in.
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Saviors
FanfictionJihoon never felt wanted. Not once. His entire life was hell, and he got roped into something that he didn't really want to do. More bad things happen to Jihoon in his personal life and the Seventeen members become his "saviors" saving him from depr...