[5] rick grimes

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rick grimes
"you don't get to choose when you love me"

it's after Terminus, you are staying at the church, and Bob comes back after being taken by Gareth and the others, and you confront Rick about how distant he has been towards you

rick
It's been two weeks after we escaped Terminus, and we still can't get over the turmoil we have endured at the hands of them, their filthy hands tainting what we thought was going to be our new safe place.
The only hope I have left is getting Eugene to Washington to cure all of this mess.

Maybe then I can live my life freely with the man I love, whom I cherish more than life;
Only problem is, after what happened to Bob, he's become introverted, closed off to the world, to us; and there's only one way to get him back: show him the amount of love we have for the man.

We walked the winding road, leaving the school where Bob was taken, on our way back. Everyone splitting off to walk in pairs, leaving me beside Rick himself.

third person POV

"Hey Rick" you say softly, trying to welcome him with your voice. He merely looks at you, and looks away, barely glancing for more than 5 seconds. You roll your eyes, you've had enough of this; as much as you know it's a tough time for him to lead this group to 'salvation' with death around every corner, it's tough for everyone else as well, you've all lost so much, and haven't gained anything but the heartache it leaves in its wake.

"Rick please, I know you're hurting, you blame yourself for not being able to keep us safe all the time, but the thing is; death is inevitable, as much as I hate to say it, there's nothing we could've done, nothing we could do but spend Bob's last moments letting him know we cared and loved him" you say, tears streaming down your fair skin, voice cracking through parts of your speech, all the time looking at his face, in which he's kept focused on what's in front of him, rather than look at you to his left.

You sigh heavily, your frustration shining through all at once.

And that's when you blew up
"You know Rick, I'm sorry you had a shitty ride okay? I'm sorry you don't like how life's going for you, but you're alive!! Everyone who is alive today has you to thank for that. If you need time to be okay, I understand; but just remember, you don't get to choose when you love me, I can't sit here and wait for you to give me the damn time of day, because God knows when that'll be; I'm sick of this! I'm tired of pretending I'm fine because you're broken"
You look at the floor, tears streaming heavier than before, you look up at what's in front of you and you can feel his eyes boring into he side of your face, you breathe a shaky laugh and continue.
"Truth is, its fucking me up too. I go to sleep telling myself I'm already dead because it takes the fucking pain away thinking that I'm not here anymore, no matter how much I love you, I can't hide how I feel; I can't hide the fact that you pushing me away hurts just as much as the loss I've experienced, because it feels like I've already lost you."

You start powering ahead of him, trying to get out of the situation that's been created, he reaches out to grab your hand, so you stop, but don't turn around and say:

"I'm not here for your convenience, Rick; it's not your choosing when you love me, I'm not waiting for you to love me"

Shaking away from him, and walking faster ahead of him, seeing people averting their gazes from you, but resisting to turn around when you hear his broken voice call out to you, you'd finally broken; and no amount of glue could put you back together again.

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hey guys! hope you liked it!!! wanted to do a pretty angsty imagine as the rest have been pretty fluffy up until now, but I'm a sucker for some fluff😋 comment some you'd like to see next or if you want personal ones or anything, I'd be happy what you'd all like to read! also, comment if you want a part two, I'm undecided at the moment
#deuces

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