Love me like you do

chapter 20 Blu

Laurens POV

She still loved me.She missed me.She didnt want to push me away but she had to?What did she mean they were forcing her?All these thoughts in my head were driving me crazy.I had so many questions that i couldnt ask her.

"Lauren Mija"

"Sinu!"i said with a warm smile getting up from my chair and hugging her.

"How is she?"she asked with a face expression i hadnt seen from her before filled with worry and fear.

"Shes better"

"I talked to the doctors and they said she would be fine but i cant help seeing my baby like this"she said getting closer to Camila

"My baby"she said gripping Camilas hand.I didnt know what to do i was frozen as Sinu broke apart in front of me.

"I dont know what i would do if you had left us" The older woman said as tears began to roll out of her eyes.

i wanted to comfort her but i didnt know how.I couldnt feel the pain she was feeling.I felt alone and broken but i know her pain was worse.

"I love you so much mija please wake up"she said now kneeling down and placing the younger girls hand to her face

My stomach began to swirl.I could feel my heart braking at the sight of the older woman vulnerable.

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It had been two weeks.Two weeks that the accident had passed.Two weeks since i seen those big brown eyes.Two weeks that i visited the hospital in hope of seeing her smile.

"Hey Sinu" i said walking into the room

"Hi Mija"she said kissing my cheek

"Anything new?"

"Sadly no"she said looking at her hands.I walked next to Camila and held her hand.

"Lauren"

"Yes"i said giving the older woman my attention

"You should go"

"What do you mean"i said confused

"Youve been great to Camila but you should give yourself some time"

"But i-"

"No excuses mija you have your life to live" but she is my life i thought to myself

"I know thats what Camila would want you to do"

"I dont want to leave her here"

"You wont Lauren.."

"I promise youll be the first to know if she wakes up"

i couldnt process leaving her here like nothing.

"Go mija its ok" she said with a reassuring smile

i gave my attention to Camila once more.I held her hand and kissed her forehead before exiting the hospital room.

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For days i became overwhelmed with myself.I didnt know what to do with myself.Where to go what to think.All i could do was worry about Camila.All these negative thoughts filled my head and i couldnt keep them out any longer.I had to leave these thoughts.I needed to go.The only place i knew to go when i had problems.

I drove to the beach i didnt care that it was late at night.It made the beach even more peaceful.I stared at the dark ocean flow in and out.Leaving traces in the sand like always.My mind became dark.I began to walk into the ocean.The cold water didnt change my actions.I continued to walk into the waves.The water now up to my neck i paused.I stared at the bigger wave that would overtake my body.