Feel for it

Lost soul

She was completely incoherent to what was happening around her but all she knew was there was a familiar arm around her, snuggled under her chest and she didn't wish to question it. She hadn't even thought to question it until the arm moved off a bit and the hand rubbed her side and hips, resting over her stomach again.
She turned her head, looking over her shoulder and saw Thomas' face nuzzled between her shoulder and neck. Her face reddened but she couldn't help but smile. It was a place she wanted to stay in forever but her stomach and bladder would greatly disagree so she slowly scooted out of the bed making her way to the bathroom.
She brushed her teeth, combed her hair enough to braid it and put it on her shoulder, and changed her nightgown to her Loki pants and Avengers shirt. It was much more comfortable and her thighs were practically stuck together from sleeping in something without shorts. Finally making her way to the kitchen, she pulled out some cream of wheat, milk, a lemon, vanilla extract, salt, sugar, and a small bag of cinnamon to make farina, and old recipe that her mother had taught her to make.
Grabbing one of her best pots, she put enough water to boil and peeled her lemon just above the surface without actually catching the lemon. She let it sit for a bit but what she hadn't noticed was Thomas walking up behind her, wrapping his arms around her as he bent to place his face on her shoulder to overlook her work. She didn't want to get burned so she controlled the startle.
"What are you doing?"
"Breakfast, the puerto rican way." She gleamed as she moved her hand over the ingredients.
She saw that the boiling water was yellow and poured 1 cup of milk into the pan, 2 1/2 caps of the vanilla extract, stirring it around with a silicone spatula. Thomas picked up her stuffed Grumpy cat and held him while he took a seat on the counter across from her work station. He grabbed her phone, turning her music on to listening and watched her dancing to the music and when The Weeknd came on, she started shaking around, dancing to the rhythm. He left the cat on the counter and started dancing next to her.
The milk started boiling so she dumped however much she felt was right for sugar and a pinch of salt into the mix and stirred that around taking out the peels. Once it was boiling a bit, she threw in the wheat and started stirring.
The music was getting crazy and when Wet Fingers started playing, she tried to dive to shut her phone but he took it away. The song was Turn Me On but the club mix and he started dancing so there was one perk. She finally started dancing with him and her hips moved fluidly, rocking from one side to another and soon the food was done. She took the farina, pouring two bowls full as sprinkling cinnamon, setting the bowls aside.
She threw the spatula in the sink and raised her hands over her head as she started dancing again, Thomas brushed his hands against hers and glided the back of his hands down her arms, keeping touch as he made it to the sides of her breasts. She closed her eyes, tilting her head against him as she danced against his chest completely intoxicated in his touch.
He grazed his hands down the sides of her hips and wrapped his arms around her once again, moving with her in the same manner. When Sweater Weather by The Neighbourhood, she was in a trance she wished never to leave. She draped her arms around his neck as he swayed against her with her mimicking his movements. When the song was over she opened her eyes and let go of him, turning to face him. She hadn't really thought of how this would affect her but she grabbed her food and walked over to the table.
When he followed, he sat down across from her. "What is it?"
She mixed her food and stuffed her face. She didn't like being so out of control of her body like the way she was with him in the kitchen. It wasn't everyday she did that but she couldn't handle it.
"Nothing. Is the farina good?" She didn't make eye contact with him while she spoke.
"I's great," he took another spoon full "but what's wrong? You were dancing quite lovely."
"I shouldn't dance like that with someone I barely know. Hell, the fact you were next to me last night only proves my point. If you want to get your things packed, I can take you home and you can get ready for Saturday."
"Wow," he leaned back in his chair "so like that, I'm kicked out of your apartment? I thought we had a glorious time in the kitchen and not to mention made some delicious food." He gestured to the now empty bowl.
"I had a lapse in thought, I shouldn't have done that."
"I enjoyed it."
"No." She said finally.
"Hell, I loved it." He leaned in, placing his hand on her forearm "I mean, have you ever let a man touch you the way I did?"
"No, and it can't happen again. I'm in the real world and this" she pointed her finger back and forth between he two of them "can't actually happen."
"A-...Are you kidding me?" He stood up quickly but made sure to put his napkin on the table, cleaning his small mess. He looked around and she didn't know what he was doing. "How can you do what we did and then go on to saying that it can't happen."
She stood up as well and pointed her finger up to his chest "I literally met you at the start of the week!"
"And you don't feel anything? I have had moments with women where I felt they could be it but never have I come close to this feeling we have, this chemistry we share with the months I was with those women."
She squinted at him "What do you know about me?" She stepped on back on her right leg, crossing her arms across her chest "What could you know in the week you've met me."
He looked at her like she was supposed to know but finally the edge of his mouth went up and he looked down, kicking his foot at something invisible. He finally crossed his arms looking at her.
"I know nothing, you are absolutely right. I'll just..." He stepped past her to the room and put on some real clothes and his shoes "I'll just leave and make sure there is no more problems for you. I'd hate to see what would happen if we actually had a moment of true love and went with it." He stormed to the dining room and dropped his bag on the chair, then took his bowl to the kitchen and put it in the hot water.
"See! That phrase 'true love', that's not something that actually happens. It's two people that happen to be able to put up with the differences and have sex, if they're lucky."
Looking at her with one of bemusement, he grabbed his bag and went to the door "I don't know what's worse. You not seeing the feelings I have for you or the fact that you do but choose not to accept them." He opened the door and walked out.
She couldn't even begin to describe how she felt. It would take a lifetime to think of words to represent the feeling in her body. When she got her composure, she put on some shoes and ran outside only to find Thomas getting in a black car. He looked at her but he just sat back and then he was off.
She walked into her house, slammed the door and walked to the couch. Sitting down, she saw wet stains on her shirt grow and become more in numbers until she shut her eyes and cried. She cried hard, hard enough that her voice was screaming and screeching while she gasped for air. Unable to breath with all the emotion overflowing from her lungs. She grabbed her stuffed animal and just put him to her chest and cried softly into his fur. She was broken and she new it now that her life was a mess but she was the cause.
After half an hour, she went to her laptop and typed until her finger tips bled and then she kept going. She described the character having the same problem and it was crazy seeing how bad she messed up but tried to write happy things. There was none.
Kady stated the shower around 12:45 and when she stripped and stepped in, she grabbed the soap to wash everything away. The feelings, the touches, the memories, but nothing seemed to work and it was then that she knew she wasn't herself anymore. She just lost a part of her, the part that was never touched by anyone until then. Until Thomas.
She stopped the water, stepped out with her towel wrapped around her chest and got dried and dressed. He jeans and tee shirt would be fine for now seeing as how she wasn't going to do anything today. So, she called her workplace to see what she could do.
"Marie speaking."
"Marie? It's Kady."
"Oh, hey! How are you, how's the vacation?"
"Not so well, I'm home actually. Is Brian there?"
"No, he stepped out and- wait, he might be back, let me transfer you real quick."
"Alright." She waited for him to answer and listened to Bach as she was on hold.

"Hello, Brian Spalder speaking."
"Mr. Spalder, it's Kady Lee. I was wondering, I just came home unexpectedly but am fine now so could I come in for work tomorrow?"
"Kady," you could almost hear his eyes roll and him face palm himself to the question. "You have hobbies but they are small hobbies. You can't base your whole life around a job and never take any time for yourself. Please, just take the last week off and then you can come back."
She sighed on the phone "Alright, see you next week, Brian."
"See you later Kady."
Turning on netflix, she browsed through everything they had to offer. Watching Leap Year wasn't an option or she was just gonna sulk for the hour. She was stuck reading all her books over and over again. When she finally put her books down and her mothers strong wine they had at an old wine-tasting test, she saw a card on her coffee table.
RED CARPET EVENT
ADDRESS: ********** ******* Drive, Bellville CA 63***
TIME: From 3 pm to 2 am
He'd left his invitation and she wanted to speak with him better so she picked up her house, cleaning and grabbed her wallet, keys, and phone. She needed to go shopping for fabric.

9 o'clock at night, getting her dress sewn up and finished was remarkable all on it's own. She knew she had to make a dress to rival all dresses so she wasn't going to stop until she loved her dress. She couldn't stop thinking about what she was going to say to him. Apologies were first to come and an explanation. Explain what? How was she going to describe everything in her mind without sounding like a loon! She called the one person she knew she could confide in.
"Patricia?"
"Hey Kady, how's it going?"
"Not so well."
"Uh-huh, so what's wrong? Spill it all."
"All?" So that's what she did. every word and conversation she remembered by heart and the most painful.
"Holy crap Kady, you messed this one up."
"Yes please, keep telling me what I already know."
"Well, are you going to this thing?
"Yes? No... Well, I have to in order to tell him everything but I'm scared."
"About what? It's not like it can get any worse from here. You aren't exactly the best person in the world and if he can see past that, you deserve him."
"Isn't it the other way around?"
"Not since you're the one who messed up." No matter how many times Kady messed up, Patricia was always there to help her back on her feet. Whether she sounded sweet or a butthead, Kady could count on her being as honest as she possibly could.
"Wanna come over?" Kady asked so someone could be company.
"Hell yeah I do, I wanna see that dress."
Not ten minutes after did she show up but with her favorite beer and some treats. The bag had Cheap candy -but it still tastes rather well- ,ice cream with great flavors, and the beer.
"Thank you." She pulled movies out of her purse and they popped them in, sitting on the couch with the cat. They watched 3 different romance movies that make Kady cry tears of joy and ate most of the treats with Patricia.
"Was I wrong?"
"For what? Doing what you did with him or totally screwing over the idea of you two together from the beginning?"
"Hitting where it hurts much?"
"Look, I'm honest and so are you. How the hell could you look at that man and say "nope, nothing here" and yet everything you've been doing says the complete opposite?"
"I just..." words escaped her mind "patty, it's just the reality. This isn't the story books."
"You bet your sweet ass this isn't one of your stories so why are you screwing yourself over like a pity-party pansy?"
"Why go and ruin my perfect peaceful life with something like that. I sort of enjoy being here alone."
"You hate being lonely."
"I have Grumpy Cat." They both looked at the cat and she sighed.
"Kady, there's something I need to tell you."
"What?"
Patricia dug out something from her purse and when she showed Kady, she didn't know what to feel.
"Engaged?"
"Yeah," Patricia put the ring back on and smiled at it as it sparkled on her finger "his names Sam and he's really great Kady, you have to meet him."
Kady was utterly stunned "Wh-....How long has this been going on?"
"Engaged a month, together for almost a year but he's wonderful. I just wanted to ask you to be my Maid of Honor."
"Uh, hell yeah! I'm so happy for you" both women hugged "When, where, what, I need details."
"Details later but for now, model the dress." Kady nodded and went to the room to try on the dress, when she came out Patricia gasped.
"Holy crap, can that be my wedding dress? That's fantastic!" She showed her the things she'd wear with it but she knew she was going. Patricia looked at her watch, 12:56 pm. "Oh shit! I gotta get home, I'll catch you on the flip side sister."
"Pinky promise?"
"Pinky promise."
Patricia and Kady have been saying that for a few years now because when she was around 18, she gave Patty a key-chain. Stamped on them was a pair of hands in a pinky promise while the back had EST. 2002, the year they became friends.
Kady waved good bye and got everything ready for the next day, that was the day she was going to be the main character in her own story.