Bullied | j.b

21: Why am I thinking about him?

A/N:

This is just so you don't get confused! This chapter is taking place in summer 2013 so they are both now 19! The rest of the book will be 2013 as well of course! And let me remind you that they haven't seen each other since the night of the concert.

I know that Justin was on the believe tour during this time but let's just pretend that it JUST ended!

Also I am switching of the dates like when he releases Believe Acoustic.

Happy Reading!

__________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

*Annabelle's POV*

I'm sitting in my bedroom; away from my fighting parents. I can hear them yelling and I walk over to my desk; trying to find my diary somewhere in the mess of papers and old pictures. Papers fly everywhere when I jump at the sound of my parents slamming a door. I bend down to pick up the pictures that fell. I flip over a picture as I pick it up. I smile at it as the good memories come flooding back into my mind. I haven't had a moment like this in forever. It's my favorite picture of Justin and me, the picture we took on the Ferris wheel.

God I miss that...

It's been 4 years since I last saw Justin. It was the night of the concert when he apologized to me I guess that it's a bittersweet feeling to say that. I'm happy without him; being involved in his life was torture. But it can be a little depressing that I'm not a part of his life anymore. The bullying went on until 2011 and I haven't cut since. I'm so proud of myself; I bet that if Justin was still here he would be proud to.

Why am I thinking about him?

I find myself somehow weaving Justin into my thoughts all the time. But I know that I don't have feelings for him anymore because I don't get those butterflies anymore. And I know that he never gets those feelings. Justin dated Selena Gomez for a while; but they broke up. He probably still loves her, so why am I even bothering to think about him?

The answer is: I don't have any idea.

I find myself getting caught up in my thoughts most of the time and it isn't a good thing. The memories are usually of Justin and I end up crying most of the time. Since when did my life get so complicated?

Don't lie to yourself like that Annabelle! You know that your life has been complicated since the day that you broke up with Justin!

"Oh shut up voices!" I mutter under my breath. Everybody lies about those things. Everybody lies to themselves and they lie to other people.

I get snapped out of my thoughts when I hear glass breaking and my mom screams.

"MOM!" I yell as I run downstairs and into the kitchen where the noise came from.

I see a shattered bottle on the ground next to my mom who is cowering by the cupboard that the glass hit. My drunk dad is standing on the other side of the kitchen muttering things to himself.

"YOU DESERVED IT B****!" He yells, way louder than he should have. I would have asked myself: Why is he acting like this? But I can't ask myself that because this is how he acts all the time. I don't even know what happened to him; he's just drunk all the time and he's constantly picking fights with my mom and sometimes even me.

"Why are you doing this daddy?" I cry out. I hate seeing him like this.

"SHUT UP BEFORE I HURT YOU TO!" He yells at me as he takes another bottle and tries throwing it at my mom. I jump in the way to protect my fragile; screaming mom from the broken glass. I feel the glass break against my forehead and I can hear my mom's voice screaming my name as I black out.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

*Justin's POV*

"C'mon Justin! We have to get to the airport at 3! We can't be late for our trip back home!" Scooter yells from outside of the tour bus. The Believe tour just ended. I can't believe it! I feel like I only started it a few weeks ago! Now it's over and I'm going back to LA and I'm planning on writing some new music; I'm finally allowed to just stay home and not have to perform every other day or so. I do love performing but it just gets a little tiring.

"I just need to get some stuff from my drawers and I'll be ready!" I yell back to him and head to my drawer to grab some pictures and papers that I left in there.

I look through the pictures of me and my friends as I pack them away. One catches my attention.

It's a picture of me and Selena.

It was all fake.

The entire relationship.

We never had any feelings for each other; it was all for the media.

We were just friends.

I'm kissing her on the cheek for the fans and 'Jelena' shippers. We took the picture before I left for the believe tour. We broke up while I was about two thirds through the tour because we didn't want to keep pretending. The goodbye was simpler than it seemed.

*Flashback*

The cameras surround me and Selena as we prepare for our 'romantic goodbye.' The lights are flashing at us from all different angles and I start to feel claustrophobic.

"Ready for this?" I whisper in her ear as I pull her into a friendly hug. The lights flash even brighter and I blink rapidly to stop the headache I'm getting from my claustrophobia.

"Yeah, my acting skills will come in handy." She chuckles. We always talk like this; making jokes about our fake relationship. "You know I'm pretty proud that we've made it this far! I thought that it would only be like 2 or 3 months." Selena smiles; pulling out of the hug.

"Instead we "lasted" for 11 months!" I chuckle, putting air quotes over the word 'lasted' because it wasn't actually us that lasted; it was our image.

"C'mon Justin! It's time to go!" Scooter says from behind me.

I look at Selena and lean in and she does the same. My lips crash against hers and she moves her lips in sync with mine. I honestly felt no sparks or anything as I kissed her; nothing like what I felt when I was with Annabelle. That was a name I hadn't thought about in a while. When we pull away; the entire group of paparazzi was 'awwing' and I smiled;

We did our job.

"Bye Selena, I love you." I say truthfully; I do love her, but only as a friend.

"I love you to." She says; pretending to choke up. I pull her into one last hug for the media and head for the terminal where my private plane was going to take off; taking me across the country to my first stop of the tour.

We wait inside the connecting tunnel for 20 minutes as the paparazzi clears out. Selena was hiding so we could have a proper goodbye in private.

When everyone was finally gone Selena came out of the shadows and I walked out of the tunnel.

"Bye Sel. Love you. I'll see you soon." I say with a friendly smile.

"Love ya to Justin. I'll miss you but I can probably come and visit you while you are touring." She smiles.

"Sure." I say as I pull her into a friendly hug.

When we pull away; I actually leave this time and she does to. "Bye!" I call out to her as I board my flight.

*Flashback Done*

I smile at the memory of our friendship and slip the picture into my bag.

I wasn't expecting this face to appear next as I flip over the next picture. It's my favourite picture of the two of us. Back when we were dating. Back when she loved me; which she probably doesn't anymore.

It's Annabelle.

I smile at the memories of our night at the fair. These thoughts bring back all of my memories that involve Annabelle. I don't get why I never went after her the night I did that concert in Stratford. I saw her smiling up at me in the crowd but I never did anything about it.

I didn't think that I wouldn't see her again for over 4 years. But I haven't seen her and I regret every mistake that I ever made with her. I just want to see her again. I went to Canada for a few concerts but they were in Toronto and I never saw her.

I want you back Annabelle.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

*Annabelle's POV*

"Justin?" I yell out to the dark figure. "Justin is that you?" I continue.

I'm desperate for answers right now. Why is Justin back in Stratford?

"Anna." He smiles.

I run over to him and try to wrap my arms around his neck but as I touch him he disappears.

"Justin? Where are you?" I whisper to him but I hear no reply after 3 minutes of waiting for one.

"JUSTIN! JUSTIN!" I start screaming frantically when I see him by the cliff we jumped off of before.

He looks so much older now and so much more mature.

I run to him and try to jump into his arms but he disappears again. I end up running farther than I should have and I go off the edge. I get that familiar falling feeling then everything goes black.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

"AHHHHHH!" I scream jolting out of my bed. The tears run down my face and I can't stop sobbing.

"Anna? Annabelle what's wrong?" My mom says as she rushes into my room frantically.

When I calm down I finally speak to my mom. "I'm fine. It was just a bad dream; I have them all the time." I tell her.

"Me to." She says quietly.

The tears slid down my cheeks as I remember my father's mistakes and I realize what's going through her head right now.

The tears.

The abuse.

The heartbreak.

The cheating.

The mental, physical and...

Emotional Pain.

"I'm so sorry mommy." I cry and wrap her in a hug. She was always there for me.

Now I need to be the strong one.

We stand in the hug crying until I start to feel tired again. I pull away and lay in my bed; leaving a spot for my mom. She crawls into my bed with me just like she did whenever I was scared when I was younger.

I silently cry myself to sleep in her arms.



__________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

A/N:

I am SOOOOO sorry that this was late! I've just been really busy with dance and my house is currently under renovations and I have to watch my dogs. I've also been SUPER busy with school; I currently have 2 really big projects that I've been working on. Sorry for all the excuses! :(

Sorry for the shortness, boringness, and lateness of this chapter :(

Some of this chapter is boring but there was a few interesting parts! So I hope you enjoyed it! (Even though it's a little short)

I'll try to update on time this weekend!

I dedicated this chapter to @_beliebers_have_swag because she has been such an amazing reader and she's been supporting this book from the start! Thank you for reading <3

I honestly don't have that many more ideas for this book so I think that it will be ending soon! :( Probably 2 or 3 more chapters after this. But don't worry! I have a lot of other ideas for books that I am currently working on and I have another book out right now and I suggest you read it <3

So probably ALL of you guys have heard about Justin getting arrested. I was honestly disappointed but I am a true belieber and he needs our support right now! If you guys didn't know: he was diagnosed with depression 5 months ago and he puts a smile on his face just for us! Khalil admitted that Justin has tried overdosing but Khalil stopped him. He tries staying so strong for us. Who else is staying a belieber? <3

Vote and Comment <3