i had always wanted children-until i met him. not the fake, just-my-next-door-neighbor zayn but the real zayn. the zayn who cared so deeply about what was his, he would do anything to preserve them. he would've been a great dad. but, he was a drug dealer. and just being aquatinted with him made you a walking target.
that's why i was so careful when we did anything. that's why i got so mad when the condom broke.
"you fucking moron! are you insane, i don't want to be the mother of your children! that baby is going to go through hell, zayn! and it'll be your fault. how could you?"
"it's not my fault, nina." he said, like a child who had been scolded by his mother. nina felt bad about her outburst but she simply could not contain her anger. his eyes were glued to the floor, a pout on his lips.
"of course it is! zayn you're a fucking dealer! im pregnant, and that baby is going to be a target. you're rarely home and you're-you're a murderer. you're not fit to be a father and i can't raise this baby alone! oh my god, what the fuck am i going to do? how am i..oh my god, zayn. im dead, im legitimately dead. ive been dead for five months! this baby won't have a family or a father-" i yelled hysterically, pacing around the room one hundred miles an hour. my head was dizzy and thumping and my breathing was irregular. severely, i was struggling to catch my breath.
"hey..the baby is going to be fine, nina. no harm will come to the baby, i promise. and ill find a way out of our situation..okay? that's my second promise. third, that baby will never ever be alone. fourth, you will not raise it alone. fifth and final, i love you so much, nina."
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|Beauty Behind the Madness Z.M.|
FanfictionIn which she'd follow him anywhere-even to her end. "This love is tainted, I need you and I hate it."
