twenty

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I look up at him apologetically.

I did actually do that to him.

I shouldn't have.

I should not have.

To think, I wanted to kill him! That is not me, cadence is not a murderer.

"I'm sorry." I whisper back, so quietly that I can barely hear myself.

He looks at me in surprise, his mouth falling open slightly.

"What?" He asks.

"I'm sorry." I repeat quietly, louder than last time though.

He smiles at me.

"It's okay, muffin. I forgave you a long time ago. Besides, I've been shot before. It's no big deal." He replies.

I blink at him.

"You have?" I ask.

"Yes." He nods.

"Tell me about it." I say, wanting to engage him in a conversation so that he doesn't feel the sting of the antiseptic as much.

"I was at the warehouse this one time and I was running to the toilet but a guard thought I was a girl because he wasn't wearing his glasses and that time, I had a man bun. Anyway, the guard thought I wa-ow! Fuck!" He whines, cutting himself off as I apply the wound cleaner.

"I'm sorry," I apologize. "Just keep going with the story!" I wave my free hand desperately at him.

"Yea, so the guard thought I was a girl running away and he shot me and the bullet actually landed on my ass. Let's just say I couldn't sit or sleep on my butt for a long time. Not to mention it was embarrassing as hell when the maids changed my bandages every night."

I smile at this, trying not to laugh.

"It's not funny." He whines.

"You don't find anything funny, you're a boring ass man." I roll my eyes.

"I find your face funny." Blake points out.

"And vice versa." I nod at him.

"What does vice versa mean?" He asks stupidly.

"Wow, you really are stupid." I note, starting to wrap a fresh bandage on his thigh.

"Hey, I graduated with a degree thank you very much!" He exclaims.

"What a waste of time," I say.

"You spent 13 years in school to get a degree that you were never even gonna acknowledge you had and become a sex dealer instead."

He narrows his eyes at me.

"Okay, I'm done." I sigh, pinning down the bandage and getting up.

I look down at him and he looks up at me.

"Aren't you gonna pull your pants up?" I ask.

"Not before you pull them down for me." He flirt-fully shoots me a wink.

I scoff. "As if."

He frowns and pulls up his pants, zips them up and does the button.

I go to walk out, feeling that I'm not needed here anymore.

But before I can walk away completely, he stands up and grabs my hand and pulls me back with my back against his hard chest.

"You know, you still need to repay me for the shit I bought you." He whispers down my neck, sliding his hands around my waist.

I feel the hairs on the back of my neck rise and a weird feeling break out everywhere he's touching me.

I turn around, his hands still on my waist.

"What repayment?" I ask, feigning innocence.

"You know what I'm talking about." He rolls his eyes.

I sigh.

"I know." I say, pushing his hands off me.

He looks annoyed by this but says nothing.

"I just don't want to," I frown. "Yet." I add, not wanting to anger him.

Immediately, I want to kick myself in the shins for adding that bit.

He takes my hand again and rubs his thumb over it.

"Why not?" He inquires.

I feel tears fill my eyes as I remember jack raping me all those times.

"I just don't." I I furrow my brows and push his hands off me.

"If you don't, I won't force you." He tells me.

"But tell me, after this, that you still don't want to." He breathes and pulls me towards him and leans in, softly kissing my lips.

I don't respond, the shock still numbing my brain.

Tears are still running down my face, making the his lips feel wet and salty against my own.

It's a while later that I finally respond and wrap my arms around the back of his neck, pull him closer and kiss back with the same amount of passion as him.

The only sound filling my ears is us, kissing.

Even the rain drops heavily hitting the roof seem to quieten down to me.

It's when we both pull away, resting our foreheads against each other that I realize what I just did.

I just willingly kissed the man who had me kidnapped and taken away from my family.

I can't have done that.

Not willingly. Never.

Blake's finger tilts my chin up and he tries to lean in again but I look away and push him away.

"No," I croak. "Please don't."

And I walk out, leaving him staring at the door in confusion.

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Okay y'all ik you guys really want updates and believe me, I want to update as much as you want them but please keep in mind that it does take me a while to write them and that I do have school and homework outside of wattpad so it's not very easy to manage my school and home life and also update often.
But I'm tryna write as much as I can so that's nice too.

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