One of the Bullied | ✔

Chapter 40 - Nate

He won't tell.

Nate won't tell.

Hopefully, he won't tell.

What if he told?

God, that would be awful.

The worst part is, Seth hasn't spoken to me since the Nate thing happened. Is this some kind of proof that he prefers to stand by Nate than standing by me?

Okay, the Nate thing was only last afternoon, and he hasn't had that many chances to speak to me considering less than fifteen hours have passed, but I still expected him to write at some point.

What if Nate does tell on us?

Seth says he'd kill him, but so would I. Everything would be ruined. I've actually been accepting Seth to make this work. I've been risking everything. He's been risking a lot, too.

If Nate told on us...

What if Nate didn't even see?

My head is such a mess that I don't even notice my phone ringing, and by the time I realise it's going off beside me it has stopped ringing. I glance at it to see a missed call from Seth.

I sigh, calling him back. I'm both happy and angry he's called me. I can't believe he was so careless. This could ruin both of us, and more importantly, it could ruin my one remaining shot at freedom and a new life.

"Hi." He says quickly. "Zoe, I've spoken to Nate."

"Oh, god, you didn't say anything, did you?"

"He saw the phone." Seth replies. "He asked me what it was and I said it was my cousin." He sighs. "I have a cousin called Zoe so hopefully he believed it. The caller ID doesn't have a picture or your surname, so he can't know for sure it's you."

I sigh in relief.

"You don't think they'll begin to be suspicious, though?" I ask him. "Because Luke almost caught up, now Nate... If they've been telling each other about this stuff then we're done for."

"I don't think any of them have told each other about it." Seth sighs. "But what I'm sure they've noticed is that I don't spend as much time with them anymore. I'm going to have to spend a few days with them so they can regain some trust."

"That's fine." I say, even though it's not.

It's not fine, because that part of Seth scares me.

It's one I was hoping he would bury and forget about.

I practically expected him to break off all contact with the other three. I obviously expected too much. It's not feasible for him to never talk to them again.

I just wish he honestly didn't have to talk them again.

"What if Nate didn't believe you, and tips the others off?"

"Then I suffer the consequences." He replies steadily. "Zoe, if he saw it was my fault for being careless." He sighs. "And now my doorbell's ringing. I should go see who it is."

"I'll make sure not to call you this time." I say with a smile.

He chuckles, saying bye before hanging up.

¬

I don't talk to Seth again, which I'm grateful for. I'm still not one hundred percent where his loyalty lies. Is it with me? Is he lying?

I sit back, sighing.

I need to stop thinking about everything. And I need to talk to someone.

The first person that comes to mind is Jean, but I brush him from my thoughts. I'm not going to confuse him with more of my bullshit. Perhaps I should talk to some of my friends in England.

Although talking to Jean is easy, because he's on the other side of the world, talking to my friends will be even more depersonalised because I haven't seen them in months.