becca
I've been in hospital for about 7 months, and still counting.
I feel like shit, because that's what's cancer does to you.
I have my hair back thank god, but I look like shit, I have none of my long brown hair left that used to be down my back.
I have bags under my eyes, which not even concealer can hide.
I have the palest skin, that no fake tan or sun bed in the world can change this is who I am.
No one even makes me feel happy anymore.
Not my mom, my dad passed away years ago through cancer, my brother died from suicide, I have only 2 friends, then there's Jacob.
World famous, amazing, adorable, internet sensation, my future husband, well that's if I even make it out of this damn hospital alive.
My mom doesn't come to see me anymore, she's a drunk and sits round the house, but I still love her.
Most people would hate there moms for just arguing with her, but I understand, my mom has had a hard life and when she does come to visit me I get all excited.
My mom will visit every say..... 3 weeks, I don't mind I cherish every second of her broken, depressed, suicidal self and make her smile and give her my sass, which makes her laugh and her laugh makes me laugh.
"Mom, can I ask you a question?" I ask her whilst we lay side by side on my comfy hospital bed, intwining fingers.
"Yeah, go on." She says still looking at the roof.
"Will I die, because I know I'm going to die soon, I overheard the doctors and you talking, because I want to make my wish.
You know them wishes, were kids meet their idols, or go on a holiday."
I say facing her.
She now faces me on the verge of tears.
"Yes you can, what would that wish be?" A tear slides down her cheek, knowing she's going to lose her last child.
"Well, you know that Jacob Sartorius kid, that I like obsess over, you know the concert that dad took me to."
I choked when I said dad.
"Yeah... w-what about Jacob?" She asked whilst she turns her body around onto her side, leaning her head onto her hand looking at me.
"can i meet him? just please?" i ask.
"of course darling. i will arrange something for you." she says with a smirk on her face.
"what?" i ask extremely confused.
"get ready. he's gonna be here in about an hour." she says squealing.
"oh my god! really?" i scream.
"yes now come on lets put on your wig and get ready." she says and we get up and do everything to attempt to make me look pretty.
"mom. will he like me? or think i'm pretty?" i ask, waiting for the truth.
"of course he will!" you could tell she was serious, which gave me hope.
"thanks mom. i love you." i say and she kisses my forehead.
"i love you too."
"whatever." i say to her making her laugh.
