I Am

Chapter 13

"You're Gabi," I said. "You're the girl from the party."

"He told you," she said.

"He never told me who you were or your name," I said. "But he told me what happened."

She didn't say anything. I thought about the pain I felt from my father. Could she be feeling the same pain from Peter? I didn't think Peter could cause someone so much pain.

"Briella," I heard Peter shout, "there you are!"

He walked up to us. A look of recognition crossed his face.

"Hi, Gabi," he said, he wasn't even pretending to be happy.

"Hey," she said. I don't think this was the first time they had spoken since that night. "I have to go."

Gabi walked off. Peter and I started silently walking towards the car.

***

I slept on Peter's couch again that night, not that I slept much. I kept thinking about Gabi. I could see the pain in her eyes. I knew that pain.

If Peter had caused her that much pain, could he do it to me? I already felt enough pain from my father, I didn't need Peter to add to it.

So far Peter had been good, though. He definitely hadn't tried to touch me inappropriately, we hadn't even kissed properly. But I just kept thinking that he'd done it before, why wouldn't he do it again.

I also didn't know where I was going to stay. I couldn't just live at my boyfriend's house, especially when his dad wasn't home. That was a recipe for disaster.

I had no family except for my mom, and she was pretty messed up right now. I just didn't think I could sleep in that room again, anyways. Not after all the hurt that had happened there.

***

"Are you going to church with me tomorrow?" Peter asked me.

"Yes," I answered, happily. I felt like I would be comfortable at church now.

"Cool beans," he said. What a dork.

We went to the hospital to visit Avery and McKenna.

Avery had started chemotherapy that day and wasn't feeling well, but she was kicking cancer's butt.

"Hi, Briella," she addressed me weakly.

"Hey, Avery," I said brightly. "How are you?"

"Dr. Rossin said I have cancer and that's not good," she said. Even laying in that hospital bed wrapped up in cords he was so innocently adorable.

"I know," I said. "But I heard you're kicking cancer's butt, huh."

She smiled. I guess she liked that terminology.

McKenna had been very quiet lately when we would visit the hospital. Peter had mentioned something about twin telepathy but I don't think he was being serious. That's just crazy talk.

***

The next day, Peter and I lwent to church. We got to the church a little bit early, but that's ok because the band was already there. Peter and I walked over to talk with them.

"Hey, Felix," Peter said, "would you mind if Briella stayed with you for awhile. She doesn't really have anywhere to stay right now."

"Of course," she said, "my mom will love you!"

I just smiled. Apparently Peter had been thinking the same thing as I.

***

When the service was over I decided I had to do it. I walked over to Jody.

"I want to be saved," I said to him.

"Ok," he said. "There's a few things you need to know. Number one, you must believe that Christ died for your sins. Number two, accept Christ's gift of forgiveness which is freely given to you. Number three, you must give your life over to God. It won't always be easy, but you must follow him wherever He leads you."

"Ok," I said. Sounded simple enough.

"Do you believe and or accept these things?" He asked.

"Yes," I said, very certain.

"Then allow me to pray with you," he said. "Tell God the things you told me. Tell him you accept these things and that you want to be called a child of God."

"Ok," I said.

He started to pray aloud while I prayed silently in my head.

Lord, please make me a child of yours. I believe that you died on the cross for my salvation. I accept your gift. Come live in my heart. Forgive me of my sins. I will go wherever you want me to. Amen.

I looked up just as Jody was saying amen aloud.

"I feel different," I said. "I feel free and new. I feel like I can do anything."

"You are going to be a great disciple for The Lord," he said.