Secret Life

WTF!?

[Levi's POV]

"One box left," I murmur as I stack yet another pile of paperwork onto my desk. I received twelve extra-large boxes from that asshat Dok early this morning. The shit he does just to piss me off... I don't even remember asking for any of this crap, but according to the letter accompanying the boxes, I had "politely demanded all records in his possession concerning the financial and proprietary gains and losses of each branch to ascertain any and all occurrences of misappropriation of funds and the potentiality of fraud - obvious, hidden, or accidental." I read the letter again as my squad covered my desk in another layer of thick paper. "I didn't even write the bastard a letter," I say sighing tossing the letter on top of everything else.

"Maybe it was an old letter he finally decided to respond to," Petra offers while handing Oluo an empty box. "You know how notorious he is about correspondence."

"Doesn't mean he can drop something like this on us whenever he gets bored," Eld protests adjusting a rather large tower.

"Cool it, Eld," Gunther interjects breaking down the empty boxes into flat squares. "At least he didn't send us actual shit like last time."

"He did that? Why?" Eren asks incredulously. As I recall he was the only one not perturbed by the boxes. In fact, to me at least, it looked like he was expecting them.

"Just being a chauvinistic ass to my lovely Petra here," Oluo answers inching closer to her.

"Oh go bite your tongue off somewhere else," she retorts before asking me, "Would you like us to open the last box sir?"

I look at the box she was referring to in the corner of my office by the bookcase. From the outset we all considered it strange - it was the only one double-sealed with duct tape, even though all the boxes have presumably confidential files; it was heavier than the other boxes with, from the sound of it, what could be cassette tapes or large audio records; and, to top it all off, another note addressed to me that I didn't bother to read thanks to the shitstorm of papers that now comprise my desk, chair, and two towering sentinels. Shitwin's work is somewhere under all that.

"No, that's not necessary. You all did great work today," I address the entire squad. "Take the rest of today and tomorrow off." Eld and Oluo cheer - typical. Gunther chuckles - also typical. Petra looks worried at the pile - yet again typical. Eren looks a bit pensive but hides it quickly - interesting.

"Heichō, are you sure you'll be okay with all this work?" Eren asks cautiously. Strange but he has been pestering me to get more sleep, so I get it. "You don't have to go through all of this in one night."

"Eren's right," Petra adds, "Just getting them out of the boxes and roughly sorted took almost fourteen hours. How about you take the rest of today off with us and start on this tomorrow?"

How bold of her to ask, I think. Must be learning from that shitty brat. "All of you are on break starting right now. That's an order." And there are the pouts. Petra's a bit overdramatic, but the shitty brat's...is.. kinda...

I shake my head a little not wanting to finish that thought as I watch them salute me and file out. I look back at the mini fortress and sigh when I hear the door open again.

"LEVI! Have you seen - WOAH!" Of course it had to be Shitty Four Eyes. I sigh again and turn around. I've been sighing since I first saw this shit.

"What do you want Shitty Glasses? And what do you want Eyebrows?" For a moment I thought it was Mike - his eyebrows are so high on his head I think they flew right off his fucking skull.

"Well," Hanji starts, "When we saw the boxes we didn't think much of it; we assumed they were new additions to the library, and I was gonna have that cute little blond coconut Arlert go through them with me."