BlurryFiction (Part II)

~Help

My cheeks are sticky, the tears have stained my soft pale cheeks. I turn to Jenna. Her soft blonde hair sprawled over my shoulder. Her soft, smooth palm against mine. I want to love her. I can't...I can't love again. People say that when you are young relationships will come and go, yeah that may be true but when you are in love. You are in love, and I...we were in love. Me and Josh. I don't wanna feel love again, but I feel like I have that feeling again. I think I...I love Jenna? I CAN'T!...I CAN'T LOVE HER, love it's good at the time but it hurts in the end and it hurts bad. I start overthinking about me and Jenna. She feels my breath getting heavier, I can tell. I start to Panic! Out loud and she opens her eyes, kisses my head "Don't worry about it Ty." The touch of her soft pink lips agains my sweaty forehead was...amazing. She called me Ty? Only...only Josh called me Ty. I worry again. I try to forget about it but I don't and it's on my mind and I think it will be until I talk about it.

Jenna leaves the room to get her bag and stuff and I fix myself in her bedroom mirror. We go to see Dayl again today, I'm worried he might not make it and if I loose him....I'll loose me. I overthink (again) and I let out a frustrated scream. Jenna barges in "Ty!? Whats wrong?" I ignore her and I keep screaming and shouting random shit "Ty...Ty answer me?!" I lash out and scream at her "STOP! YOUR NOT JOSH! STOP TRYING TO BE HIM! YOU AREN'T!! LEAVE ME ALONE. I NEED TO GO AWAY!" I fall to the ground in tears. Jenna looks into my eyes. She looks shocked but at the same time she doesn't, my face is red with anger and my face is streaming with tears. I get up and barge past Jenna, I lock myself in the bathroom. I look at myself in the bathroom mirror "LOOK AT YOURSELF! YOU ARE FUCKED UP IN THE HEAD! JUST DIE. YOU DO NOTHING IN THIS WORLD! YOU WERE BETTER OFF STAYING IN THE SAME ROOM YOU WERE BORN IN!" I scream at my reflection and I smash my hand into the mirror, the glass cuts my knuckles and my blood sprays up the wall. I grab one of the glass shards that broke off the mirror. I look at myself again "You worthless peice of shit!" I start to slice my arm's. The blood pours over the bathroom and I scream. I don't wanna do this anymore! Jenna barges in and screams my name. I jump in shock and the glass shard cuts me deeper than expected and the blood sprays all over the place. Jenna screams and I shout "SHUT THE FUCK UP! EVERYONE SHUT UPPP!!!" I fall to the ground and slice the palms of my hands from the glass on the ground. I burst into tears and Jenna grabs me she doesn't hug me she grabs me and drags me to the hospital.

I wake up? I can't remember anything. I see Jenna sleeping on a chair over from me. I'm at the hospital, the last thing I remember is Jenna dragging me here. I sit up and rip the wires from my body. I walk over to Jenna and wake her up.

She looks angry but I grab her and pull her up to me "I fucking love you, I need to get over myself! I need to get over my past and accept my feelings. I love you Jenn. Do you love me?!" Jenna bursts into tears and grabs my face and pulls it towards her and smacks her soft pink lips against mine. "I fucking love you Ty!" She grabs me by my waist and hugs me tight. We fall onto the floor making out and I feel happier than ever.