4 Years • jb

;44

| Tristan |

"My father died when I was 10," I began looking at Dr. Peterson. "It was a car crash, a horrible one." I looked down. "I thought my whole world was ruined. I didn't know how I was going to survive with out my dad."

"Did your mother get re married?" She asked.

"Rather quickly." I spoke up. "Mr. Martin Matthews was his name," I shot a fake smile. "He was your average handsome bachelor loaded with money. He welcomed my sister, mom and me with open arms it felt like my family was whole again and I love it." I laughed at myself.

"You're laughing?" She questioned.

"Four months." I sighed, "It took four months until he started raping me." Dr. Peterson moved closer to me, "Did anyone know?" I cracked a laugh, "Oh yeah, let me tell ya about it the whole neighborhood knew." I sarcastically spat. "Are you kidding me? Of course no one knew."

"How long did it go on for?"

"For five years." I answered. "My mother married him only after a year of dating him. From the time I was ten to fifteen he raped me in his home office when my sister was at school and my mom was work."

"Did he rape your sister as well?"

"No. Just me." I said quietly. "I remember hating myself. I cried myself to sleep at night thinking it was my fault." I could feel my eyes water up. She nodded, "You were young and afraid Tristan, you used it as a defense and blamed your self. That's very common."

"Being raped by your stepfather is common?" I snapped. "Be careful how you word things Dr. Peterson." I spat.

She nodded, "I apologize that you misunderstood me. That's not what I meant Mr. Con. My apologizes." I rolled my eyes and stayed silent.

"Can I ask what happened?" She spoke up.

"After a while I couldn't take it anymore." I told her. "So I set him up. I hid a camera."

"To catch him in the act, i'm assuming?" She cut in.

"Exactly. I wanted him to go jail and pay for what he did to me. But things didn't go as planned." I said truthfully. She leaned in, "How so?"

"As I got older the more abusive he got with the rapes. This day just so happened to be the worst of all. After he stopped raping me, he started to beat the shit out of me. So much so, I thought he was going to kill me."

"Tristan-"

"I fought for my life. I fought for my life until I took his." I cried. "I grabbed the only thing that was in arms reach. I grabbed the scissors that were lying on his desk and stabbed him in the neck immediately."

Dr. Peterson didn't say anything. But I didn't expect her to."

"I was charged with manslaughter in self defense. I served 7 years of probation and served 1 year in county." I nodded, "I thought it was bullshit to be honest, since I had all the evidence on tape and I was only saving my life." I cried.

"That's right Tristan you were saving your life. Don't over think that. You did what you had to do." She rubbed my leg for comfort. "You asked me how I felt the night I got attacked?" I brought up.

Dr. Peterson nodded for me to go on.

"I felt the same feeling I did that day with Martin." I said. "I didn't know what to do, the attack was so unexpected. I just know I didn't want to feel like that anymore. That old chapter of my life has been over for years now."