before mimi

precious cargo

BEN POV

Tina came back with something different about her. i had to look over her one more time. it wasnt the cute little baby bump that was hardly noticeable...it was her hair. It was straight. my fluffy coconut hair was now straight. 

she turned around setting her shoes next to the door and her hair just reached the end of her back. when the hell did it get so long? her curly hair always clouded my judgment on length- i never understood how her hair could go from right above her breast when curly to all the way down her back when straight. it was so black and shinny i just wanted to run my hands through it. 

but honestly- i was a bit sad. i loved her curly mane the best. 

without acknowledging me, she went straight to the fridge and grabbed the pint of ben and jerrys half baked out of the freezer. she didnt look at me until she opened the seal and stuck a spoonful of the ice cream in her mouth. i laughed at the face she made when she noticed I was there.

"i....didnt know you were there" she said with a mouth full of ice cream. her spoon was in mid scoop and a bit of chocolate was spilling from her mouth. i smiled at her just thinking about all the crazy shit we were about to endure with this pregnancy. Tina is already crazy-shes over the top and so outgoing. i dont know what this is going to do to her personality, but all i can picture is her bossing me around more. 

"i am well aware of that" i answered now letting her be. a few minutes later she plopped down next to me and lifted her shirt.  she wrapped her hands around her growing belly and looked at me.

"pop quiz is this ice cream or a human?" she joked now rubbing her hands up and down it. I put my hand on hers.

"hmmmmmm let me guess.....ice cream?" i teased as she swatted me making me laugh. 

"how fat do i look actually?" she asked now unsure of herself.

"pumpkin its hardly there. there is really nothing there" i reassured her. there was really nothing there. at 4 months,  she was hardly showing. i always have to remind myself on our doctors visit and  reassure myself that every woman looks different at all of the stages. I still couldnt get over the fact that she looked like maybe two months-not four. i rubbed my hand up and down her tiny bump just thinking about what the little human could be. 

"well your supposed to tell me that" she said with a half smile. i could tell she was exhausted. she had been working all last night and had hardly been sleeping.  her head was laid back looking at the ceiling as she was fighting her eyelids.

she had also started throwing up more and i felt awful. watching her be miserable made me feel miserable, since there was nothing i could really do to make the pain go away.

"no. im supposed to tell you the truth-and you know what?" i said now pulling down her shirt.

"what?" she asked as she followed me with her eyes. i stood in front of her on the couch with my hand outstretched to her. 

"you need to go to bed. now." i said now grabbing her off the couch. i knew she would contest. she always did.

"uhm...no i dont. im fine. and its only like 930?" she said as i escorted her to the bedroom. 

"you need rest." i said now opening the door. she turned around and looked up at me. i could see it in her eyes- she was ready to fight me. 

"im. fine." she said with those eyes i knew too well. but i wasnt going to back down this time. I can still remember the first time she shot those eyes at me; i was terrified. but ive had years of experience with them now.