before mimi

no sleep

"TINA?" i called throughout the apartment. i waited a brief moment to receive no answer. instead of yelling again, i took off my work shoes at the door and walked into the low lit atmosphere. the tv was on low with bobs burgers shining through the screen. Tinas tablet was laying on the living room table with a bunch of posted notes and small drawings laid out around it. 

she was here somewhere-maybe in the shower. i turned around to the kitchen island, where she left me a plate of food. i had lost track of time at work and she hadnt called me all day. i was getting kind of worried but dad assured me that pregnant women just needed their space.

i stuffed a couple of green beans in my mouth and washed it down with the bit of water she left in the glass. i took a deep breath now taking a look outside to all the shining lights of the city. i could hear some of the horns from the cars below. looking at the time, it was 1125 already. i didnt know i stayed so late. walking into the bedroom expecting to find her in the shower, there she was, on the bed. 

T was finally sleeping-she had been having a hard time falling asleep lately and i could only imagine it might get worse. i felt for the poor woman. she would toss and turn for hours just to be waken up after two hours of sleep. i sat on the bed next to her body. her tshirt was becoming a bit too small as it wrapped around her belly. 

 i just took a moment to look at her sleeping figure-her lips slightly parted and pieces of hair covering her face. her little nose made slight sounds indicating breathing and i couldnt help but stare at her growing belly. 

i couldnt believe i was going to be a dad-i couldnt believe we were going to be parents to the same child. i could only imagine her being in a relationship with me let alone having my baby. My hand went to her belly just rubbing gently on the hardened surface. i have to say, it was a bit scary how small her stomach still was for four months. every time i look at it i cant help but worry that maybe the baby isnt growing correctly. but the doctor said everything was fine. Tina has abs of steel and basically her abs were holding the baby in more than a woman with less muscle than her.

reaching over with my other hand, i swiped my phone off the night stand. the time was just rolling by so fast and i needed to get to bed. looking over at her again i couldnt help but smile. she was so cute. 

I took my phone a snapped a couple of quick photos of her. there was a soft blue bouncing off of her skin making her look almost painted in the photo.

 she would be pissed in the morning but she would get over it. I scrolled through the couple of shots and just couldnt stop scrolling. 

i dont even remember how i scrolled back so far but my memory was now ignited. 

 I cam across one of my thousands of pictures of T. her eyes in mid flutter and her cheeks rosy. She was plastered a year ago. she was never a big drinker and  i dont know what happened that night. i couldnt help but laugh and think back on it. 

"babbbbeeeeeee" t dragged now slinging her arms around my neck. she was looking everywhere but me and now giggling. the booming music made it hard for me to hear her-and the busyness around us seemed to swallow her. 

"what the hell is wrong with you?" i said with my beer still in my hand. she never acted like this before. 

"nothing. i just...i just. im hot" she said now standing to her full height. i could look into her eyes without breaking my neck since i was sitting on the barstool. 

"i know you are" i said now pulling her to me. instead of fighting me back like she usually does she started giggling again. 

"t. really what the hell is going on" i said staring into her eyes.