Those Three Words - (Beau Brooks / Luke Brooks Fanfiction)

Chapter Thirty Four - Barbeque

"Just... You know... Us." He said sheepishly, fiddling with the palm of his hands. I could tell that is wasn't a very good subject for him.

"Okay, let's talk about... us." I didn't really know what to say.

"Okay. Well, it's probably not a good idea for us to be... You know... Messing around." He cringed at his choice of words, so did I.

"I didn't think that's what we were doing here, I thought it was a bit more than 'messing around'."

"Oh, it is Bella. But... I don't think it is a good idea to be doing it secretly, behind our loved ones backs." He still wasn't feeling relaxed, I could tell by the way he was shuffling around, "I have a girlfriend, we both know that, so I have a lot more at risk here." Wow.

"More at risk? I have the friendship of many people at risk by sneaking around with you. Actually, I wouldn't even call it 'sneaking around' because I'm pretty sure we went out in public yesterday."

"But as soon as we got back, we were kissing and cuddling and don't get me wrong, I love it so much being able to do that with you, but it feels so... Dirty."

"So you're saying... You don't want to carry on with... This?" It hurt, like a knife to the stomach, I felt like he had led me on slightly. I was quite stupid for trying to go there anyway, he was happy with Becca.

"No, not at all." He looked into my eyes, "Well, maybe... I just don't see how it's going to work." The knife that he just stabbed me with was back, but this time he was slowly turning it clockwise.

"Oh, okay..." I trailed off from answering, knowing that anything I said would sound desperate. I didn't need him, but if he wasn't in my life then I know I would feel so empty and alone. He was the only person who made me feel safe and the only person I could trust, so I didn't want to ruin things by being too forward.

"I'm so sorry Bels, if I could change the whole situation now I would, but I can't." He put his hand on my shoulder for reassurance.

"Please can we just go, I'm fine." I wish he never brought the subject up, for once in a long time I was happy, and he had to go and spoil that.

"Sure." He picked up my bag and made his way to my front door. I took my opportunity to try one last time with him, see if there was anything there. I pulled on his arm to spin him around and he immediately pulled me closer. He opened his mouth, giving me access.

I pushed my tongue between his lips and his lips met mine, and my fingers ran through his hair, tugging on it slightly. His mouth parted at the same time mine did but instead of carrying it on, he stared deep into my eyes.

"How do you have this affect on me Isabella Brice? You do tasteful, amazing things to me." His eyes flicked between my lips to my eyes as if he wanted to lean back in but instead of him getting his own way, I licked my lips, teasing him and pulled away, leaving the house with confidence in myself.

I heard a chuckle from behind me as he shut the door.

"Are you not going to lock it?" He shouted slightly. I didn't turn or answer him, I simply threw the keys over my shoulder with a perfect aim and they landed right in front of him.

"Okay okay, less of the sass please Bella, that's my job." I spun around on my heels and he winked at me so I flashed a smile at him.

It took us a quarter of an hour to get to the barbeque, and for the car journey we were jammin' to the radio and there was a few moments of eye contact here and there.

"So what's happening with Beau? Are you gonna speak to him?" Luke questioned me at we got closer to the venue (a golf club in the middle of no where).

"Definitely not, no matter how strong I feel and look, it would break me in an instant." I sighed.

"Yeah... But Bella let's be honest, you don't look very strong do you?" I laughed at his offending insult and he made it worse by jiggling my arm which was in no way muscular.

"Okay I get it, you go to the gym I do not, my arms aren't in the best shape." He laughed at my insecurity and flexed his left arm, making a groaning noise.

"I'm just kidding, a woman's arm is not suppose to be muscular like a man's, it's part of the rules." He put his arm back on the wheel but I was still staring at the way his top tightened around his bicep when he tensed.

"Sexist much?" I said, even though I know he was right, the girl should not be strong. He laughed at my common reaction and by common, I mean the way every girl reacts to a sexist comment.

"Oh shut up." He playfully tapped my thigh, "Here we are." He pointed to a huge, old looking building.

"Oh my god, it's... Beautiful." My mouth was almost touching the floor with the amount of shock I was in, I'd never seen anything like it. "Are you sure this is a golf club?"

"Yeah, crazy right?!" He looked just as impressed as I did.

"I think I might get golf membership." He laughed.

"I think you might need a job first Bels." I give him a scolding look even though I knew I couldn't afford something like this. He held his arm out, "Shall we?" I wrapped my arm around his, my clutch bag in the other.

"Let's go Mr Brooks." Mr Brooks, I remember when I use to call Beau that. I was terrified to face him.

He just giggled and took his first step through the grand doors. I stood by the entrance so my eyes could adjust to all of the magnificent decor, the huge stairway wrapping around one half of the room, the amaz-

"Excuse me." I realised I was still in the doorway.

"I'm sorry." I turned to find Beau, just an inch from my face, himself just as wide-eyed as I was. "Come one Luke, let's go." My arm was still hooked to his, I hope he couldn't feel how much my whole body tensed as my eyes, now watering, connected with Beau's.

"Luke, that was so hard, I can't do this." One tear slowly travelled down my face, and Luke's thumb caressed my cheek whilst wiping it tenderly.

"Just, compose yourself Bels. I know you're stronger than this."

But was I stronger? Or did I just need to feel Beau's arms wrap around my waist, and tell me that everything's going to be okay?