Him

Eleven- Dates and Polaroids

He taught me how to Love
But now how to Stop. 

Reliving memories has always been a bad idea for me. Even the best of memories drag me down into a seemingly bottomless pit. Although most of my memories don't seem fond anymore.

I'm pulled out of my thoughts when I hear someone knock on my front door. I stand up from my bed and pull on a pair of sweats to cover up my unusually pale legs. For a swimmer, I'd think my legs would have at least some amount of tan, but they're just a pasty white color.

I open the front door to reveal Eric on the other side of the threshold. My mouth opens slightly as I look at the clock in the kitchen, it reads 7:00 p.m. My gaze goes back to Eric, "Shit," My eyes travel down my sleepwear-clad body, "I didn't realize it was this late."

He chuckles, "It's okay."

"Come in, make yourself at home, I'll get changed really fast," I say, walking toward my bedroom. Closing my door, I run to my wardrobe and quickly pick out an outfit. Once I'm dressed I look at myself in the mirror, I'm wearing faux leather pants with a lace-up, long sleeve crop top.

I look at the picture of Reid on my wall, "It'll always be you, I'm sorry."

"What?" Eric says opening my door.

"Uh, nothing?" I say quickly. "Just talking to myself." I shake my head slightly in disbelief, cocking my eyebrow, wondering why he just decided to walk into my room. I start out the door and close it behind me.

"This is a nice place you've got here, do you live alone?" He asks with a smile.

"No, I have two roommates; The one you saw at the store, Cassie, and Kyle," I reply.

"You live with a boy?" He asks snidely.

"Yeah, he's like a brother to me, nothing to worry about," I say trailing off. I look at the balcony and see a light on in his apartment. They still haven't rented it out to anyone else, no one has taken it. They've moved all of his stuff to a storage shed now. That was a hard day.

Although I never see anyone in that apartment, no one goes in anymore. Someone has probably decided to tidy up the place a little, they're probably going to put it back on the market soon. My attention turns back to Eric, who is now inspecting my kitchen it seems.

"So where are we going for dinner?" I ask nicely.

"I was thinking Red Lobster," He mumbles as he drifts through my living room.

I feel a lump in my throat at the mention of Red Lobster. "I don't really like Red Lobster," I lie, "Do you think we can go somewhere else?"

"Damn, I really had my hopes up for Red Lobster," He chides.

"We can go there if you want, I guess," I say in a small voice.

"That sounds great," He smiles. I nod slowly and walk toward the door. He walks out before me and I close and lock the door.

I'm a very empathetic person; I can feel other people's emotions, it's like they course through my veins. It's enough to send me into a frenzy.

Feeling people's suffering and sadness all the time reminds you of your own. Feeling people's happiness and joy makes you wish you had that. 

I look at a couple sitting across the room from us and I sigh, they seem so happy, and I myself am very distraught. It makes me want to have that again, and they remind me so much of Reid and I. But here I am feeling lonely even though someone is sitting right across from me.