I Need You (Kim Taehyung)

23

Everything had gone by in a blur. Jin had TaeLyn on an oxygen tank, Jimin and Yoongi trying to take care a crying child, Jungkook and I trying to help in some way. The ambulance arrived a few short minutes later and took TaeLyn. "Jungkook, go with them and I'll meet you there." I watched as the paramedic, squeezed air into her and pushed at her chest. Jungkook's eyes were wide and bloodshot, not taking his eyes off his sister.

The doors closed and sirens blared as the ambulance drove away. Jin ran frantically into the house while Namjoon tied the baby down into a car seat. "You boys coming?" Jin asked, locking their front door. Jimin and Yoongi had to leave but promised they'd visit as soon as they got home and changed. I tagged along, my grandma knowing where I'd be. Namjoon drove because Jin seemed as if he wasn't in his right state of mind. He was scared, shaking, and choking on whimpers. Namjoon held his hand, kissing it occasionally and rubbing his thumb on Jin's forehand. I'd never seen him like this.

We arrived at the hospital and jungkook notified us that she was in the ICU. They were running tests on her and would be out in a moment. Her right lung had collapsed and affected her course of breathing. This affected the movement of her diaphragm and the left lung wasn't strong enough to help her breath. "They should be out in a moment—"

"Dr. Kim?" An elderly man asked as he stepped out of a restricted area on the third floor of the hospital. Jin greeted the man, obviously knowing him. They exchanged looks, Jin's hopeful look disappearing. He sighed and turned around to hug her husband who's eyes had become bloodshot. "We need to search for a transplant. We got the lung to begin working again. We've got a machine breathing for her till she can breathe on her own. But till then, we don't know how much longer she will last on just her left lung."

Jungkook turned away, facing the wall and covering his mouth. As the doctor spoke more on her condition, Jungkook walked away. I ran after him. He stood at the top floor, ignoring my presence and leaning on the edge of the roof. I've known Jungkook for almost fourteen years. I hadn't seen him cry since he was 5, when he fell off the top of a playground for trying to climb the monkey bars. His shoulders dropped and his chest heaved, letting out a soft sob. Jungkook hands covered his face and rubbed at his eyes harshly. I wrapped my arm around my friends shoulders, letting him cry on me.

Minutes later, we sat on the floor. The wind blew our hair in various directions. "She doesn't deserve this," Jungkook croaks, sniffling and wiping his nose with the sleeve of sweater. I sighed, heart growing heavy. "What?" I whispered, looking at my best friend. He sniffled, looking at the ground. "She doesn't deserve tobe sick, with her life on the line. To be friendless just cause stupid bitches think TaeLyn's something she's not. She's too beautiful for this world and they can't take it. My sister is the best person anyone will ever know and nobody will take the chance to see it." I rubbed Jungkook's shoulder as he leaned his head on me. He breathed out heavily. "Maybe it's my fault." I sighed and leaned my head on his. "How can it be your fault? It's no one's fault but society itself—"

"Maybe if I would've been the jackass brother and pretended as if we weren't siblings, she wouldn't be here at a hospital with just family. She'd be at a friend's house, having the time of her life." Tears dripped down his face and before I could even take in the sight, he wiped them away. I sighed again and squeezed him in my arms. "She has friends, Kookie." I mumble. I stare off into the sky. "Maybe not girl friends," I pause momentarily. "But she has us. Yoongi, Jimin and me." He sniffles and nods slowly. Jungkook lifts his hand and sets it on my thigh, patting my leg. "Thank you for being here, Tae. For being there for her." There comes that sinking feeling in the pit of my stomach. Guilt. "I trust you more than anything and if it wasn't for you, she would've been crying in her room the entire night."

"She's lucky to have a boyfriend like you. Kind, Honest, Loyal," I gulped, feeling sick.

But I'm not, Kookie.

I don't deserve your sister.

I looked down at my best friend as I bit my lip when it began to quiver. My eyes glossed over and I blinked back the tears. I drew in a shaky breath then let it out.

And I don't deserve you.

~0~

"Where's your girlfriend?" Jaehyun asks, approaching me at school as I pick up a few of TaLyn's things from her locker at the end of the day. I hold them in my arms and walk past her after shutting the locker closed. "Yah—"

"It's none of your business, Jae." I mumble as I walk into one of TaeLyn's electives the only one we don't have together, hoping I'd caught the teacher. I sigh when I walk into a dark classroom. The door shuts behind us, leaving me with an angered, short, and petite girl. "It is my business when my boyfriend—"

"Fuck buddy," I smirk with a glare, lifting my right eyebrow. She glares. "You know I couldn't date you because of Tae—"

"And why did Tae even matter when you don't care about her!"

"And you do?!" I stare at her with a blank space, swimming through my thoughts. Do I like TaeLyn? Is that why I have all these urges to— No. That can't be it. I could just be sexually attracted to her but then when she does just the randomest thing I just—

What's this feeling in my abdomen? This clenching, gut numbing feeling that made me feel lighter when I thought of Taelyn underneath me as we made out on her bed. Her giggle, from when I breathed on her neck, echoing through my brain and unleashing an unknown warmth throughout my body. The blush rose to my cheeks and I looked at the ground, hoping to hide my face. "Tae..." her voice drops to a whisper. I looked up at her with a look that said it all. The shock on her features was evident. I didn't know myself if I liked TaeLyn but there was something. "No. You don't." She shakes her head repeatedly and takes deep breath, struggling to keep her emotions wrapped up. Jaehyun whips back around to look at me. "What? Did she give you a blowjob? Let you eat her out like I did? Or did you finally get a taste of what its like for her fat ass to be on your di—" But there was also Jaehyun who has undeniably cute when she was angry. I couldn't take it when I wrapped an arm around her waist and brought her closer, my lips landing on her. She looked at me with an incredulous expression. I smiled and pecked his lips, staring into her eyes.

"SARANGHAEYO."