Under the Lights | j.b

warz(a)one

continued 

Before I truly thought it through, my finger was already on the hang up button and I had ended the call.

I panicked. 

I clearly didn't respond well to confrontation. 

My phone buzzed and I flinched. 

I mentally tried to prepare myself before I checked my texts, but gave up when i realised nothing was going to get rid of the anxious feeling in my stomach. 

You can do it. 

How bad can it be?

Chandler Bing: sasha 

Chandler Bing: answer me 

Chandler Bing: I'll call u when we get to the mainland

and then came the more recent ones...

Chandler Bing: who the fuck is he 

Chandler Bing: are u kidding me 

Chandler Bing: did u just fucking hang up on me

Fuck. I needed to get inside and figure this out away from everyone loitering in the lobby.

Swiping my access card, the elevator doors closed and began its ascent.

The apartment was quiet when I entered, the only light came from a decor lamp and the episode of Neighbours playing on the TV.

"Cute picture." 

"Jesus," I swore, my sisters voice cut piercingly through the silence. "Alyssa you scared the crap out of me." 

Alyssa glared at me unwaveringly and for the first time since posting the picture, I felt guilty. 

"It's not what it looks like," I feebly attempted to explain myself.

Apparently it was the wrong thing to say because her eyes narrowed marginally. "I don't care what it does or doesn't look like, because I'm not Sawyer's girlfriend and he can do whatever he wants with whoever he wants." 

Alyssa wasn't even gunning for subtle and even though she was voicing the same argument, it hit me more forcefully now that I had something to compare it to. 

"To make matters worse, you just up and leave instead of sitting here with me while I try and figure out a way to help you get through this without making you seem like the clingiest fucking person and scaring Justin away," Alyssa spat. "Which by the way you completely fucked up when you uploaded that picture." 

I recognised the heated look she was giving me and now that the fire was ignited in Alyssa, it didn't seem like it was going to burn out any time soon. 

"Why is it any different?" I answered dejectedly, there was no fight left in me. "He did it first." 

"What are you? Five? Do you think that a grown man, especially one with as much female attention as him is going to abstain from sex just because he maybe likes a girl he texts probably so he doesn't feel lonely?"