Under the Lights | j.b

zawyer

NOTE: FINALLY. SAWYERS P.O.V - KIND OF. this chapter takes place during za back story, before Sasha gets home from Lauren's and gives some insight into Sawyer's feelings for Alyssa. For a reason......


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"Hello?" Sawyer squinted, attempting to read the caller ID on his phone while his sleepy eyes adjusted to the influx of light coming from the screen.

A choked sob escaped caller's lips, "Sawyer."

One word was all it took for alertness to overtake him. Sawyer sat up in his bed and switched on his lamp, "Angel, what's wrong?"

"Please. I need you."

He was out the door before Alyssa had finished her sentence.

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He held her while she cried, stroking her hair, telling her how beautiful she was to him, how perfect he found her.

Alyssa's tears were not a usual occurrence.

This time, he suspected they were the result of her being home alone.

"I'm sorry," Alyssa croaked, when the tears had settled.

Sawyer's heart clenched; the unfortunate outcome of seeing the woman he loved in pain. His fingers slid over her cheeks, wiping away the remnants of a breakdown he wished hadn't had to happen in the first place.

"It's okay." He pressed a firm kiss to her forehead and tightened the hold he had on her waist. "Don't apologise."

"No but because I know you probably worked late yesterday and I woke you up and made you come to me because I'm weak and I can't, I don't know how to--"

Alyssa's tone gradually took a turn for the worst and Sawyer knew he had to calm her down before she riled herself into having a panic attack.

"Be alone because I'm so scared all the time and Sasha didn't come back and I didn't want to call her I couldn't admit--"

"Hey, hey, stop it," Sawyer interrupted gently, sliding a hand down to rub soothing circles on her back.

Alyssa complied, gazing up at Sawyer from behind eyelashes wet with tears. Sawyer's heart picked up it's pace, a natural reaction to having his girl so close to him. She was beautiful, just as breathtaking even when she was like this, broken and fragile.

"Tell me," He urged softly, "What's wrong?"

Alyssa took a shaky breath and shifted her body closer to his. Their covered skin pressed together tightly made her feel safe and protected.

"I had a nightmare."

The fear in her tone made his chest constrict and his stomach tense. "What did you see?"

"It was," Alyssa sniffed, "I don't remember, but it felt so real like I could feel them touching me."

Who? He wanted to ask her, who was touching her? But Alyssa was already terrified enough. The who's weren't important, right now he had to focus on calming her down.

Sawyer's leaned closer, taking her lips in his for a soft, languid kiss. "No one is ever going to touch you again, Angel."

Alyssa's fingers gripped his back securely, "Except you?"

The hand that wasn't on her back cupped her neck. "Only me." He told her reassuringly.

"Show me," She pleaded, big brown eyes wide with the left over fear from her nightmare, but also the longing that only Sawyer could elicit from her. "Touch me. Make me forget."

Sawyer didn't need words. His mouth covered hers again but this time, he didn't stop kissing her. Only when he rolled over so he was on top, careful not place his weight on her.

What he saw underneath him, was enough to make him die a happy man. Light brown waves of hair, still slightly tinged with pink splattered on the cushion, Alyssa gazed up at him with so much tenderness and affection he thought his heart would explode. "What do you want?" He probed tenderly.

"Don't leave me," Alyssa was resolute, but Sawyer still detected the crippling insecurity in her eyes.

His lips traced the line of her nose and she shuddered, "I'm right here," Sawyer hesitated before continuing, "for as long as you want me."

"I'll always want you," She warned lowly, as if she could somehow scare him off. 

Sawyer repositioned her in his arms so they were laying comfortably on the couch with Alyssa tucked under his chin. "Then I'll always be here."

"What if you find someone else? Someone who isn't so messed up." Alyssa tried to play her sentence off as lighthearted, but Sawyer could hear the worry in her tone. 

"Never."  Maybe it was the sincerity in his words or the sheer honesty behind them, but Alyssa's eyes lit up hopefully and she leaned up to kiss him softly.

Tomorrow, he thought to himself, when Alyssa finally fell asleep later. He would speak to her dad tomorrow and even if it meant he'd be reassigned somewhere in South America, he'd be okay with it as long as he could be with Alyssa.

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