THE REAL PINK PONY

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by finchenthusiast

by finchenthusiast

Me: So, I made up a rap for the ponies. (Not really, look up The Real Pink Pony on YouTube) Not the Creepypastas. The actual ponies
Jeff: yay?
Toby: oh shit
Me: GIRLS! YOU CAN COME OUT!
Twilight Sparkle, Fluttershy, Rainbow Dash, Pinkie Pie, Applejack, and Rarity: *comes out of kitchen*
Me: BEGIN
Twilight: *clears throat* May I have your attention please? May I have your attention please? Will the real Pinkie Pie please sit down!? I SAID: Will the REAL Pinkie Pie please sit down?
Applejack: Uhh, were gonna have a problem here.
Pinkie Pie: *smiles* Y'all act like you've never seen a pink pony before. Eyes all on the floor, like Mrs. Cake is being a whore. With me babysitting worse then before. Apples to the core? That apple core is rotten now! And Twilights like:

Twilight: Oh no, what a catastrophe! She didn't use the legend of the mirror pool, did she?!
Pinkie Pie: and then Spike said.. Nothing, you bronies! Spikes a bone-head, hes hiding under his bed! Brony guys love Pinkie Pie.

Applejack: Pinkie Pie? I'm sick of her! Look at her, hopping around shaking her you-know-what infront of you-know-who

Rainbow Dash: Yeah, but shes so fun though!

Pinkie Pie: Yeah, I probably consumed too much sugar and sodium but no worse then whats going on on Nickelodeon. Sometimes I wanna get on TV and cut cheese, but I can't! Nor can Cheese cut Pinkie! My plot is in your face, my plot is in your face! Clap your hooves and do a little shake! And thats the dance move we teach to little kids and expect them not to know what twerking is. Of course their gonna know friendship is magic and everything thats tragic in the world is not run by little girls. We ain't nothin but horses! Well some of us donkeys that can't be bothered to sing on key. But if we can show a male and a female pony's marriage, then why can't two female ponies just kiss?! All I know is Eminem will be pissed if he hears this. Sorry, those bronies can't resist! Cause I'm a pink pony, yes, I'm the pink pony! All you other pink ponies are just being phonies! So won't the real pink pony please sit down! Please sit down! Please sit down!

Fluttershy doesn't have to be loud and annoying.

Fluttershy: Yay..

Pinkie Pie: But I do, mainly because I get paid to. You think I wanna be best pony? Half of you bronies don't even follow me, let alone know me.

Rarity: But Pinkie Pie darling, your just so weird!

Pinkie Pie: So? Don't you know thats why I'm feared? My jokes go on longer then Star Swirls beard! Damn Dashie! 10 seconds and the sky is cleared?! Now I can properly flip off Gilda, I wanna control her with my mind like Matilda. Griffon bitch, yelling at Fluttershy, making Andrea cry, thats why we all want you to die! Put me on blast on Discovery kids! And show the world how the Hub wanted to get rid of us. I'm sick of you DeviantArt groups, who the hell even starts groups? All you losers ever do is fart poop! Theres hundreds of us who talk like me, trot like me, break the fourth wall like me. Who hop like me, stop drop and clop like me, I'd rather be me then Trixie or Flash Sentry!

Cause I'm a pink pony, yes, I'm the pink pony! So won't the real pink pony please sit down! Please sit down! Please sit down!

I'm like a headtrip to watch, whether you watch me for my personality or my crotch. Look, I'm just glad Hasbro didn't draw balls on ponies, but now all you bronies answered the call and hung it up on your wall. I just go around being all random, cupcakes? I hand em out to this fandom. Oops, did I say "hand"? I meant hoof. Keeping in with the whole anybody/anypony spoof. Its funny, cause when were canceled us ponies will live on through brony artist's pencils. Twilight will still be crazy, Dashie will still be lazy, Fluttershy will still sniff daisies, Applejack's dog will still have rabies and Rarity will never say "maybe" to a date with Spike. Man, take a hike to Haiti, find a new lady. Maybe that dragon that Fluttershy was raggin on will be at BronyCon. So will the real Pinkie please sit down? And if you wouldn't mind, please make a frown. Cause only one of us can smile so bright that you lose your sight. I don't bite, but if your a cake, I might!

Everyone: *claps LOUD*

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Ah god, my mind is so mad. I'm so sorry for this. XD I'll do a little shoutout.

iQuench
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