Journey's Child

33

Both Thad and Dr. Lansing tried to comfort me. A nurse came in and gave me something that calmed me and made me sleepy. I slowly drifted away to the safe place where there's nothing to feel or remember.

When I woke again my room was swimming in shadows and Thad was gone.

"Thad," I called.

There was no answer.

"Thad!" I yelled as fear reached out to hug me.

"Thad!" I screamed starting to cry.

A young nurse came in and turned on the overhead light.

"He had to run home for a little while, but he should be back soon."

"Okay," I said feeling better with the light on and her company.

She raised my bed up and showed me the button to push if I needed something. I remembered being shown it before, but I could never think of it when I swam up through the thick, dark pool of sleep.

After she took what she called my vitals, she set a bowl of jello cubes in front of me.

"You need to eat this, Kiddo. Okay?"

I sat still, staring at the lime jello and wishing I was somewhere else. Tears leaked out of my eyes and rolled down my cheeks.

"Gilly, you need to start eating or you won't be able to go home."

My eyes widened as I turned to look at her.

"I don't have a home here!" I yelled, letting go of some of my frustration. "My mother's real sick and I don't have anywhere to go! Where will I go?"

"With me."

I looked up to see Thad standing in the doorway.

"You'll stay with Captain and me until your mother is better."

I covered my face with my hands and cried. I don't know what I was feeling - gratitude, confusion, fear or maybe all of that and more.

The nurse got up and left without saying anything.

Thad lowered the rail on my bed and sat down facing me.

"Gilly, I thought that we would go visit your mom. Would you like that?"

I nodded my head and took a bite of a lime jello square. I've never eaten lime jello since.

*

My mother's room was up several floors, so we took the elevator. I hated being in the hospital. Every noise was loud; the constant phones ringing, carts rolling on the floors, even voices sounded like they were shouting. The smells were awful, too. I smiled thinking to myself that I found a place as bad if not worse than the latrine at the cottage.

"I don't like it here," I told Thad as we waited for the elevator doors to bang shut.

"Well, you keep eating and drinking lots of water and you will be able to leave soon."

When we got to my mom's room Thad had me sit down on the bench outside the door with him.

"Gilly, before we go inside I want to tell you what to expect."

Suddenly my stomach tightened up.

"Your mom has had several operations. She's doing much better now. They brought her from ICU where she has been to this room. Now she just needs to get stronger.

"What kind of operations?" I asked, knowing it was time to face this head on.

Thad reached out and took my hand. "She had some internal injuries. They had to remove her spleen and repair a tear in her liver."

I wasn't an expert in anatomy, but it sounded serious.

"They also had to repair her jaw and cheekbone. Her jaw is wired shut, so she isn't able to speak. Her head and face are covered with bandages so she can heal. It looks scarier than it is, okay?"

I nodded, feeling anything but okay.

*

My mom wasn't even really awake. She moved a little when I said 'hi' to her and she moaned. If Thad hadn't promised me, I wouldn't have believed it was her. Once we were back in the elevator I wrapped my arms around Thad and cried. He gently hugged me back. He didn't say anything, he just stayed close and let me mourn the terrible circumstance that put us here in this awful, strange place.

Back in my room I gratefully crawled into bed. Seeing my mom had shaken loose more flashes of what had happened. I remembered Tom hurting her and running for help. A dinner tray arrived, allowing me to concentrate on eating. I was finally hungry.

After I ate I asked Thad, "How did my mom and I get here?"

He leaned forward in his chair and seemed to be thinking about what he wanted to say.

"Well," he began.

"Hi Gilly. How are you this evening?" Dr. Lansing asked as she walked up to my bed. "I understand you visited your mother."

I nodded, hoping she would go away. I wanted to hear Thad's answer. Instead, she pulled up a chair and joined us. I was beginning to think they were in on some secret.

"Yes, Thad took me to see her," I answered, looking at both of them suspiciously.

Then he looked over at Dr. Lansing and told her my question.

"Well Gilly, what is the last thing you remember about that night?" she asked.

She talked about that night like it was far away, but to me it was just around the corner.

"You remembered Tom hurting your mother," she coaxed. "Then what happened?"

I tried to picture that moment, but I couldn't find it in my memory. I felt like I was trying to find my way out of the dark. Suddenly there was a flash of light and I was back in the doorway of my mother's room.

THx