pellucid. + jhs.

sanshiyi

"i'm sorry, again, for blowing up on you."

"everyone's always f.ucking sorry," jae smiles sadly, as she planted a small kiss on hoseok's cheek.

"i'm also sorry for interrupting. i didn't mean to."

"it's okay. i forgive you."

the two take a promenade around the woods, their feet crunching the many scattered leaves on the ground. the sound echoes throughout the whole area.

the thoughts inside jae became too big for her to keep inside, and she soon starts to convey them out.

"hoseok, what if all of this is just my mind's work," she asked, breaking the soft silence.

"of course it is your mind's work. your mind is what makes your body function, right? you're seeing things because of your mind..."

"that's not what i meant hoseok. what if all of this, is only my mind working? what if my mind is deceiving me, trying to make me believe that all of this is real, but really it's not?"

hoseok only simply shrugs, swiping his thumb back and forth against jae's hand.

"well, if it's just your mind working to fool you, it would still be real though, right? you can feel it, you can see it, so, how can it not be real?"

"i'm not s–sure," jae starts to pout, "i think it's because it's not real for anyone else."

"who cares? so what?"

"well... maybe you aren't real."

hoseok stops his tracks, and tightens his grip on jae's hand.

"what?"

"maybe you aren't real," she repeats, voice barely above a whisper.

"don't think like that... why are you still doubting me? jae, i thought—"

"but everyone tells me you don't exist," jae states with a slightly wavering tone, "my parents, my doctors, my brother—"

"don't listen to them," hoseok interrupts with a firm voice. his eyes pierce jae's eyes, and she can almost feel them look through her soul, "remember? i told you, they are plain, horrible lies! jae, please, you can hear me right," he squeezes her hand a little, "feel me?"

"this can be all a dream, or a hallucination," jae counterargues.

she escapes hoseok's grip, to fidget with both of her hands.

"jae, i exist," hoseok barks, "i know you hear me!"

"just shut up for a minute," jae screams back.

"why can't you believe me?! do you think your own mind can describe things as perfect as i do? do you think your own f.ucking mind can make love to you?!"

"shut up!"

"listen to me, jae!"

"you're only a figment of my imagination!"

"no, i'm not!"

"you don't exist!"

"i do exist! jae, just please hear me—"

"you are not real, you are not real, you—"

and suddenly, jae feels a strong impact collide with her cheek, which causes her to tumble to the ground. she suddenly remembers hearing screams.

she looks back up, with tears in her eyes, as a deep shade of red leaks from her bottom lip.

"did you— did you just p–punch me?"

hoseok looks at her with wide eyes.

"j–jae, i didn't mean to—"

"get away from me."

jae scrambles back up and backs away.

"no, jae, i'm—"

"go away," jae screams out with tears spilling, "don't come closer!"

"jae, i'm sorry! i'm so sorry!"

"stay away from me!"

"jae!"

she starts to run faster, sobbing loudly, as her feet quickened away from the woods.