Driving Life!!

Exploration

4th session:
Alina
I reached on time to Mr.Hayat's clinic because I was too curious to know about his life and failures.His successful life was infront of me and I was eager to know how he was a Quran teacher by profession and a psychologist as part time.

What had made his personality so calm and different then men of his age.He had zero arrogance.

His face had soft smile worn on it whenever we met.In just 3 sessions he had changed me.He had transformed me into a completely different human being with lots of positivity and will to live this life.

I had to ask many questions.I was pin pointing each in my mind.I was gathering courage and noticing the importance of each question.

Thinking of a man reminded me of Harib but I spared myself of his  thoughts successfully and I was surprised by myself.

I was about to enter his conference room when I noticed him crying on his prayer mat.He was offering some prayer.It was time after Magrib prayer.The sesssion was about to begin.

When Mr.Hayat saw me,he wiped his tears and said:

"Assalam.o.alaikum young girl,I am worried that I have to make witness to my deeds today and that would be you except Allah.My failure is only between me and Allah,no one on Earth knows about it but I promised you to tell."

I blinked several times and gathered the courage to speak:
"Don't worry Mr.Hayat I will keep it a secret but I al very curious now."

Mr.Hayat smiled and started his story:
"young girl!I was in eighth grade and I was a brilliant student and I am now but I made a big mistake and I cannot forget the failure I faced."

I saw tears falling all over his face as he continued.

Mr.Hayat continued,"My teacher named azka was very young and beautiful.I used to be tall and handsome and looked older than my age.My teacher called me at her home to help her complete result compilation with her.I agreed at once and when we had to compile result I counted the numbers while she copied them on progress sheet.When I observed a guy named talha was on top and I had lesser marks than him,I all at once decided to tell a lie.I told my teacher that I had more marks than Talha.As she was just writing what I was telling so she wrote what I said,blindly trusting me."

He paused,took a deep breathe.
I was watching him astonished,amazed and surprised.I asked,"Is this your failure."

Mr.Hayat said,"Yes little girl.I consider it my failure.I lied to win but I was not the winner.I had won before my family,friends and teachers but I had lost before Allah."

Mr.Hayat sipped water from glass and changed his position.I could feel he was uncomfortable.After a while he continued,"Life is not given to us to win.Life is given to us as a blessing to learn from it.Don't be a driver but its better to be a front seater so that you can view the path clearly and make ur mind to cope up with situations."

I was watching him with surprise.He called such a minor event of his life as a failure.What a different man I had met.Who the hell on Earth would think like that.

Mr Hayat broke my bubble of thoughts,"Young girl,I like the glow in your eyes when you think.Will you like to share your thoughts."

I said,"how could this minor event be your failure.you just lied and you were just in eighth grade.Children do like that and that's quite normal."

He replied,"oh yes you are right but I felt guilty when the boy who was the actual winner cried before me.Talha cried because he knew he was the winner.He knew I have cheated him.Talha was very angry.He asked me why I did that and I told him that I did this to impress my father so that he could buy me a play station.He got even more angry and said that May your father die you bastard and kicked me off.

On the result day,my father was dead.I could never impress my father.He was not there to witness any of my success by than.I had lost my support system.I was guilty for my father.I was guilty before Allah and before Talha.

Talha cried alot when he heard of my father's death.He even apologised but I had to apologise him.I was the one to be blamed.I ever since ask for forgiveness from Allah."

I wanted to console him but I had no words.I understood his emotions and I was crying too.

After few minutes if silence,I asked,"How you became like this?"

He said,"What I am today is because my father wanted me to be a Hafiz.e.Quran,he also wanted me to study tafseer.He used to say that Quran without the essence of understanding is useless like English you know how to spell but with no understanding of the language.
My father used to teach me Quran on weekends and I brilliantly memorised it to 10 paras before he died."

I had more questions and I didn't know how to ask each.I was surprised by Mr.Hayat and his way of life.

I asked,"How you thought of becoming a psychologist and Quran teacher.How you manage it?"

He smiled and I had seen him smiling after a long time.I felt good.He took his shahadat finger up and recited Qalma.e.shahadat and then replied,"young girl,I wanted to be Quran teacher because my grip was on it by now and I wanted to teach many for the sake of Sawaab and Sadqa.e.jaria but Almighty Allah wanted me to do two tasks at the same time.

While I was teaching Quran during my fsc,one of my student of tafseer class,who was a psychologist by  profession asked me to opt his profession as he thought it would be good for me even if I could not make it to MCAT.My aggregate was less than 65% so I could not enter medical school.Mbbs and Bds were not my options now so I opted for psychology.

I just kept studying and Allah kept doing miracles.I got selected for scholoship and left for best university.So psychology was selected for me and I was selected for it."

I could only say,"MashaAllah!Allah is great!!"

I had still more questions but explorations already done were hard to digest so I left some for next session and crossed my fingers..

*writer*
best of luck.hope u r enjoying reading :) How about Mr.Hayat? Are you liking his character..??
stay tuned!!