After The Confetti Falls {Joshler}

Chapter 3: Change of Hair, Change of Heart

Tyler isn't quite sure how he got home that night, or when he went to bed, because it was all a daze after he picked himself up off the floor and left his dressing room. The next thing he knows he's sitting at his breakfast table with a mug of coffee, and Jenna is going on about something, her sister and work he picked up but the rest was silence and moving lips. He must've at least seemed like he was following her for awhile because it wasn't until she was well into her ramblings that she stopped and asked if he was okay. He didn't hear that part. She said his name and he didn't hear that either.

"TYLER." Jenna snaps in front of his face and he flinches and takes in his surroundings.

"Are

You

O-kay?" Jenna asks once more enunciating and pausing with each word to ensure that he hears her.

"Oh. Yeah, I'm fine. Just a long night last night." He lies; his tone sounding dazed.

"Are you sure? Because the last time you got that spaced out was the day after you had a really bad day." She presses. She doesn't have to say what day because he knows what she means and he doesn't want to think about it. It involved a trip to a therapist because he was beyond her reassurance, and Josh sleeping in their bed at the end of the day because it was the only thing that could get him to sleep. Jenna slept on the couch and kept her phone on in case he needed something. Josh wrapped his arms around Tyler and talked to him, and sang, and told him stories until Tyler fell asleep, and then Josh didn't sleep at all. Staying up all night to watch over him like a guardian angel and ready to comfort him should he ever be afraid. Usually it's not that bad. Usually bad days he is just tired, and depressed, and cries a lot.

"I'm not sure..." He responds honestly. "In fact, I'm sure that I'm not sure. Yesterday wasn't good, Jenna."

He opens up, looking out one of their tall windows and watching a flock of birds fly by in a V shape against the crisp blue sky. He can't cry anymore if he tried, he doesn't feel anything. Empty is better than too full of pain though, right?

"I'm so sorry, Ty. What happened?" She asks walking over to him, full of concern. He doesn't move. He doesn't even look at her.

"I just... I just was thinkin' about the man on the elevator and I got that awful feeling and thought about... him, and then I pushed Josh away and I don't know what's gonna happen to us..." He says, feeling emotion bubble up inside of him again and threaten to spill from his eyes. He doesn't tell her about the tree, or about being in love with Josh still. That would not go over well.

"Ty, I'm so sorry, baby. She takes his hand and strokes it with her thumb, looking at him with sympathetic blue eyes. He's watching the traffic below them and the lights change through blurred eyes. Yellow like Josh's hair, red like the confetti, green like the tree.

"Is there anything I can do for you?" She asks.

"No. Not this time, Jenna. I don't think there's anything anyone can do. I can only pray things work themselves out." He answers with a solemn twist of his lips.

"Well, why don't you give him a call today and talk things through?" She suggests.

His first thought is no. There's a reason they didn't talk yesterday, why would today be any better? Then his next thought is that this is serious. This is about their relationship, and avoiding things isn't going to help anything.

"Okay. Okay, I'll call him tonight after dinner." He says, making sure to set himself a timeline because he needs enough time to prepare himself, and he would probably chicken out otherwise. He thinks about getting up and doing something, but some heavy, persuasive force keeps him sitting and unmoving. He can't just sit in the chair until dinner, he has to do something. He decides he's going to go to the gym. He first debates whether going to a different one than the one him and Josh usually go to, but he's almost positive Josh will be doing the same thing and have the same rationale, and they'd end up bumping into each other. So, he gets up, and goes to grab his hoodie. "I'm gonna go to the gym. He says while putting his arms through his hoodie.