Matthew hasn't seen his father in eleven years.
But now Arthur wants him to babysit his younger brother while he goes off to London with his new husband.
He doesn't know who this kid is and has never babysat before.
But one thing is clear about t...
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"So...I looked at some of your art..." Matthew didn't know where to start with this guy. They were basically strangers and he had already seen one eighth of his sex toy collection. "It's good, right?!" Wow. Modest. "I guess..." "Jou guess?" "Well...it's kinda dark...but it's detailed....maybe too much for book illustrations, though...." "I can do somezhing simpler if jou vant." "That's fine." "So...is Peter jour kid?" "What?" "Is he jour kid?" "No. He's my half brother...kinda..." "Kinda?" "I was adopted but then my dad remarried and they used a surrogate to have Peter." "Und he lives here?" "I'm just watching him for a little while." "Oh..." "So what aboot you?" "Did jou just say aboot?" "What?" "Aboot?" "I'm Canadian." "I know...but I didn't zhink jou guys actually said zhat." "We do...I think..." Great. Now he was having an ethical dilemma. "But, anyhow, what's your family like?" "It's just me und mein little bruder now." Gilbert answered, crossing his legs. "Vhat do jou have upstairs?" "Huh?" "Peter told me zhat it vas hour secret base." "It is." "Secret base of vhat?" "I'm not telling." Weed wasn't supposed to be fully legal until July first of twenty eighteen. He didn't know if Gilbert knew this so he wanted to keep his mouth shut. "Based on vhat ve found under jour bed, I can only guess.~" he purred. "It is not a bdsm sex dungeon." "Now I'm disappointed." "I'm disappointed that you wanted that." "Only God can judge me, und he zhinks I'm awesome." "I'm pretty sure God left us ages ago." "Nuh uh!" "Yeah huh!" "Vhere did Peter go?" The statement was followed by an aggressive vibrating sound from in Matthew's room. "Oh no. Not the death penetrator five thousand!" Matthew groaned, intending fully to give that child an ass whooping. "I have zhat one too!" Gilbert beamed. "You shut the hell up." Matthew got off the couch and stormed into his room. "Excuse me but could you not do that please and thank you!" He shouted at Peter who was stacking dildos left and right. "Where do you buy these?" "Dad is not going to buy you any." "Can you buy me some?" "No I cannot." "Why?" "Because you don't want these. Trust me." "I think I broke one." "What?!!!" "It started leaking." "Oh. Never mind that." "Hey Mattie, what's for di-whoa." Gilbert stepped in, gaping in awe at all the dildos Matthew had. "These aren't all mine. I was holding them for a friend...." "You have friends?" Peter asked. "I'm putting you up for adoption." "You can't do that. You're not my mom!" "Try me." "I'll fight you. I'll fight anything. I'll fight the moon." Matthew rolled his eyes. Why did little brothers have to be like this? "I think it's time for bed." Matthew picked the struggling boy up and carried him into his own room. "Can you read me a bedtime story?" "No." "But I'm not sleepy." "I vant to hear a bedtime story too!" Gilbert whined, hopping into the bed. "You're an adult." "So?" "So why don't you tell a story?" "Jou're zhe vriter." "So?" "Ugh. Okay. So zhere vas zhis mean old ogre who lived in Austria." "Why Austria." Matthew asked. "Because I know an ogre who lives zhere." "What?" "He stole mein girlfriend." "What the hell are you on?" "Anyvay, zhere vas zhis ogre who played piano at all zhe pretty princesses until he finally got one. He vas like a douchy pied piper. Ja." "Why are you so salty?" "And zhen..." Gilbert continued to tell Peter a story about a prince who tried to steal the princess back but died in the process. He was very passionate about the tale and soon enough, Peter was asleep. Matthew pulled the blankets over his body and tucked his Optimus prime under his arm. He then walked out of the room with Gilbert in tow. "You get to sleep on the couch." "Still better than an air mattress in the basement." "I'll get you a spare blanket." Matthew opened his closet and removed an extra comforter from the top shelf. He passed it to Gilbert. "I'll be going to bed now. If there's anything you need, just let me know." "I vill," Matthew nodded before slipping into his room. This was going to be a crazy few weeks.
