I finally put my baby on the wall
"I'm really sorry." Lars said, spooning more rice into his mouth. "I kind of figured he would have told you."
"Lars, can you never let me fall in love again? I'm just so lonely now."
"You're being overdramatic."
"No I'm not!"
Lars sighed. "Anyway, there's a reason I came here, and it's probably the worst time to spring this on you...but..."
"But what?"
"Your father is coming home tomorrow. His mother died and they already had the funeral and everything so he has no reason to stay."
"So...does that mean you're taking Peter away too?"
Lars nodded. "Do you want to come along when I drop him off?"
"No! I could never!"
"It wouldn't hurt to see your dad just once."
"I'm not going."
"Matthew, can I tell you something?"
"Yeah? What?"
"The publishing agency doesn't pay for your house."
"What?"
"Your father contacted me shortly after I took you in. Remember? You were living with me for a while until I got that deal?"
"Yeah...but what does that have to do with-"
"He's been paying your rent all this time."
"Why would he do that? What's he getting in return?"
"He wanted to be a writer too when he was young. But as he got older he realized it was impossible to survive doing only that and decided to become a teacher instead." Lars explained. "When you ran away, he was worried about you."
"I was...doing fine before I got published."
"You were working three jobs and living in a friend's basement."
"But I was alive."
"And now you're alive with all the free time you could ever want."
"Okay, but what are you giving him in return. It's not sex. He doesn't trade in that currency."
"I've been keeping him updated on your life."
"WHAT?!"
"He deserves to know you're okay."
"No he doesn't!"
"Matthew, he was terrified that you would hurt yourself. You were depressed and living on the edge of a mental breakdown."
"It was his fault."
"He didn't know how to cope." Lars insisted. "He was feeling exactly the same as you but he had a son to take care of and bills to pay."
Matthew swallowed. "I can't forgive him."
"I'm not going to force you to see him. But you're going to feel awful about not getting closure."
"I don't feel awful now."
"I'll take you out for poutine if you come."
"Fuck."
"All warm and melty with the fries all crispy."
"Ugh. Talk dirty to me."
"And when you take a bite, the cheese curds squish between your teeth, making a light squeaking noise."
"I'm totally orgasming right now. Fine. I'll go."
"You're too easy to manipulate."
"Can I ask you something?"
"Sure."
"After tomorrow...I'll be all alone again...won't I?"
Lars smiled sympathetically. He reached out and ruffled Matthew's hair.
"Of course you won't." He said softly. "You'll always have me."
Matthew leaned back against the chair behind him, sighing deeply.
"God...I...I miss him so much." Matthew started to sob. He didn't know where these tears were coming from, but they just wouldn't stop.
"Hey, it's alright. You can call him."
"But it's not the same and long distance charges are super high and-"
Lars wrapped his arms around Matthew, smothering his tears. Hugging wasn't something he did much of, so this was a surprise.
"I'm sorry."
"I just want him to come back"
"I know."
The pair sat on the floor like that for quite a while, Matthew crying as hard as he could, while Lars rubbed his back and whispered to him.
"Everything will turn out okay."
Matthew doubted these words were true.
YOU ARE READING
The Long Way Home
FanfictionMatthew hasn't seen his father in eleven years. But now Arthur wants him to babysit his younger brother while he goes off to London with his new husband. He doesn't know who this kid is and has never babysat before. But one thing is clear about t...