The Grass Isn't Greener On The Other Side

Chapter Seven

That night sleep was not my friend knowing this was going to be along last day at this conference. Boy oh boy this last night got very interesting to say the least. The next morning we woke up more like they woke up and not to much happened.

The girls decided to go to the mall that was by the hotel we were staying at. Me being in a bad and foul mood decided not to ruin their day with my mood stayed at the hotel and cried myself to sleep. By the time I woke up they were back and it was time to get ready for the last night of the conference and on this night we all go out and do something fun. We arrive after finding a parking spot all of us get out and this night had me completely unprepared for what was about to take place.

*fast forwarding to end of conference talks*

As I'm standing there alone this guy comes up to me and strikes up a conversation. Don't ask me his name he was not my type even though I was in a foul mood he was not the cause of this mood Titus was. Speaking of the devil he happens to come up to me and says we need to talk. Whilst I'm in the middle of a conversation with this gentleman who you could tell was interested in me. Cock blocking much?

As I'm trying to ignore him by giving him a simple head nod to try and continue my conversation with this gentleman. Titus takes the attention from the guy as he proceeds to talk to him. Now, I'm completely thrown off guard by his actions why do you need to talk to me? To add insult to injury Cassie and Titus were not just boyfriend and girlfriend. She was his fiancé. As if I wasn't already emotionally beat up but you're engaged and intentionally trying to keep me from talking to another man.

*fast forward to about 2 hours later*

We are at the bowling alley which because it's the last night of the conference we always go out and have fun. Tavari noticed I wasn't in such a great mood and my normal bubbly self. Little did he know I did not want to be there at all watching Cassie and Titus all happy while I'm over here dying a slow and painful death.

We came because the girls wanted to come they made new guy friends and wanted to spend time getting to know them. Me being who I am will not stand in the way of someone else being happy even when all I want to do is jump off a bridge and end it all. 

Tavari pulled me outside and asked what was wrong. Words wouldn't form only thing that came out was tears. He pulled me in for a hug and said,"Don't let them see you cry you're strong I know it sucks but it'll be ok." Those weren't the words I wanted or felt like was needed but they were said. We walk back in and I challenged Tanielle to a game of pool. Which halfway through the game Titus walks outside and Tanielle says,"Here is your chance to lay it all out on the table with no regrets."

Our new friend Morris took over playing against Tanielle. So I'm giving myself a little pep talk it's no hold bar now it's now or never. Say it or forever hold your peace. Here goes I walked outside to see Titus standing at Cassie's car apparently he locked the keys in the car. Great timing right but it's now or never so he see's me outside.

First thing he says,"So, I hear you were out here crying earlier." I nod my head yes he goes on to ask."why?" My heart stopped for a few moments was he still clueless he really couldn't be. Well ladies and gentlemen he definitely was.

My mouth felt dry and I tried my best to muster up some moisture in my mouth but to no avail. I managed to lick my lips and poured out my heart to him. "I love you more than life itself, I pray for you more than anything, you have the potential for greatness even if you don't see it. I've liked you since the first time we met in that restaurant. The relationships I've had in between the time we were out of contact never felt right because I only wanted you." He just stood there like a bump on a log or a dear caught in headlights. Everything in me wanted him to say something yet he remained silent but suddenly he was interrupted from whatever he was thinking by his other brother.

He came outside to ask him about the keys and he said."yes they are locked in the car." His brother shook his head and walked back inside. Titus looked at me and says,"We will finish talking about this later." More of me died actually more like he backed a 16 wheeler over my already broken everything.

From that moment forth I despised black men. On that night the innocent wanting to be in love Amiah officially died a ruthless no nonsense cut throat play him before he plays you Amiah was born.

She was left outside that day of the bowling alley. When I walked back in Tanielle asked me what happened I shrugged it off and went back to playing her in pool.