From the Diaries of a Witch [Completed] [Under Edit]

Entry 30-A Change In Mind

Dear Diary,
    I looked for James all over Hogwarts today but I couldn't find him. He wasn't in any of his classes. When I was heading to dinner, I found him. He was with someone. It was... Kendra. They were kissing. Just kissing and kissing and kissing and I was just like THEY'RE KISSING! This time he looked like he was enjoying it. "James!" I shouted and they looked up. "James how could you." "Yeah James, how could you. Kiss me? I'd never kiss you in a million years," Kendra chimed in. I rolled my eyes "James...," I said and motioned for him to come to me. He shrugged and I walked back to the dorms. When I got back to the dorms, James came in. He saw I was hurt. Very hurt. "Gemma I didn't kiss her. She kissed me! I swear," he told me. "I've heard that one before. Remember, first year," I snapped back. "Even if you hate me, I just you to know that I really do love you. And Kendra," he replied. I turned to him. He loved Kendra? He lied! He never really loved me. It was all just a joke from the beginning. "Well if you really love Kendra then you don't love me because if you really loved me, then you wouldn't love Kendra," I told him, folding my arms. "You cut me off. I was uh... um going to say uh... and Kendra is not as great as uh you," he hesitated to say. "You hesitated," I told him. "No, maybe, yeah ok. I hesitated," he said as he sat down next to me "I don't think I really gave Kendra a chance though. I mean she's this intelligent, generous, amazing, gorgeous women. I couldn't imagine life without her. I don't really see why I ever really loved you. I mean you broke up with me. We were never really meant to be together. Let's just be friends, Gemma. I'd really like that." Friends? He thinks I want to be friends with him after his little speech? "You know what James, I don't want to be friends," I shouted as I stood up "If this is some joke please tell me now or I'm leaving you for good. For your own good, she only loves you for your money and fame. Good luck living with that monster you call your girlfriend." "Gemma, that amazing women you call a monster is not in fact my girlfriend. She's my fiance and she's not a monster. She's generous and kind. Intelligent and clever. Gorgeous, beautiful, pretty, stunning, hot, attractive. I'm so lucky that she's mine. I can't wait to marry her and have children with her," They're engaged?!? Marry her? CHILDREN? That was going to be me by the end of this school year. It was going to be Solest. Now it's going to be Kendra Potter and Solest Malfoy, side by side. Married the same summer. I'm losing everything that keeps me sane. My boyfriend, my parents, my best friend. Next thing you know Wyatt and Samantha will be gone too. I'll have nothing. I tried to show James the reality. "She's you-know-who's daughter. She has his blood running through her veins. Aren't you the least bit worried," I asked. "She's different. Like I said before, she's so amazing I can't even describe it. She's the moon, the sun, and the stars. She's my whole world," he said with the dumbest look on his face. One tiny smile spread widely across his ugly face. I hated looking at him. I hated him. I hated Kendra. I slapped him. I slapped him good. Real good. I slapped him again and again. It still didn't get the smile off his face. I began to cry. Water rolled down my cheeks and onto James's once soft hands now dry and cracked. I felt the exact moment when my heart shattered into a thousand pieces, piercing my insides. So much water came through my eyes I almost couldn't see. I grabbed his hand and held it in mine and he kissed me on my wet cheek. That wasn't enough so I pulled him close to me and kissed him. I wanted him so bad. I wanted him back so bad. Tears kept coming through my closed eyes. I could tell he wasn't back. He wasn't mine. The kiss felt almost... different. He's changed. Finally after a while he pushed back and said "Gemma I love you but I just... can't." I slapped him again and he leaned in and kissed me. I didn't understand. This kiss was different than the first almost as if a curse had been lifted. That was it! He was under a curse! He didn't REALLY love Kendra, it was just a spell. I didn't think to much of it, I just enjoyed the moment. As we kissed, my tears dried up and I smiled. I draped my arms over his shoulders and placed his damaged hands on my waist. By then we were both standing in the corner of the common room. He left my lips and pressed his lips against my neck. I admit, I giggled a little. It felt like nothing else mattered, nothing it all. I felt like I was alone and it was only me and him. I had escaped to another world. That's how I always felt when we kissed. It was... amazing. When he got to my shoulders, we backed away from each other a little before I said. "James, even if you love Kendra, I still love you. I will always be there for you. I will always consider myself Gemma Potter. I am eternally yours, James Sirius Potter. Always." He stared down at me "I don't know what your talking about. I only love you Gemma Jade Malfoy. There's nothing I would change about you. There is one thing I would change though. Think about it ok?" I nodded. Change? I thought he literally just said I was perfect as I was. "I want to change your surname from Malfoy to Potter. That's all I want you to change, nothing more," He held out my engagement ring, that same one that he gave me a week before our seventh year began. The same one I had to give back because of a stupid feud that stupid Kendra created. It was silver with a big green diamond in the middle. It was simple yet so beautiful. I cried but I only shedded happy tears. He hugged me and I smiled. I felt happy. I hadn't lost all hope yet. I had James back. I didn't know how long it would last but I tried to just enjoyed it while it did last. Solest would always be there for me. I didn't know if my parents had made up and my dad was ok with James but I didn't care. I loved James and I didn't care what my dad thought. He may hate James for his parents but I don't care. I love him for who he is. He slipped on the ring and I gave him a quick kiss before heading to my dorm. I didn't have dinner but I had a very emotional night so I went to sleep.
    Sincerely,
    Gemma Jade Malfoy