silence//phan

9

Phil

I wish it was different. I wish Dan liked me. But no, he doesn't and I have to move on and treat him as if I don't care.

What is wrong with me? He had just freaking told me that he wasn't comfortable with talking about his sexuality, then I go in and kiss him. Am I that fucking stupid?

Now he just looks uncomfortable around me that I'm scared to go near him. What if he hates me now but just can't say it?

I need to talk to him. Tell him he still is my friend and that I'm sorry for kissing him.

I go to his locker, homeroom, library. No luck. I call him. It goes straight to voicemail. I shouldn't be this worried. He's fine.

Just when my heart rate calms, I see Zach. His knuckles split and bloody. He's followed by Ian and Bryan, their hands are similar.

That's when I run. I need to find him, and make sure he is safe. I check all the bathrooms, the closets, empty classrooms. He's nowhere to be found.

My mind is like a car going full speed, trying to piece together where he might be.

Then it hits me. They wouldn't beat someone like that inside the school. He's outside.

I push open the painted brown doors to the back of the building, and sure enough, he's laying limp on the ground covered in blood and harsh red marks.

"Dan! Dan? Can you hear me oh god, please be okay." I say.
I crouch beside him on the ground, feeling for a pulse and checking his breathing.

He's alive. A weight on my chest I didn't know was there rises, and I try shaking him awake again.

He's really out.

There's not a ton I can do other then take him to my house. I could take him inside the school, but that would just make Dan anxious and embarrassed when he woke up.

So I pick him up, and carry him home.

°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•

He's still out. When I brought him to my house, I set him on my bed and tried my best to clean him up.

I'm currently just watching him sleep, making sure he's still breathing. I have no idea how bad his injuries are, and if he doesn't wake in a few more hours I swear I'll take him to the ER.

His eyes are moving under his lids, and he's stirring. I move to sit next to him on the bed when his eyes open and he tries to sit up. He gasps out in pain.

"It's okay, it's okay. Shh, you're fine." I whisper. He looks around. He raises his hands to sign but flinches and lowers them.

"Here, I'll help you sit up, okay?" I say. He just looks at me. I put a supporting hand on his back and another to grab a pillow and prop it up for him to sit back on.

"Here. Okay, I'm going to clean up the blood I didn't get earlier. Sorry, I couldn't without um waking you and stuff." I tell him. He still doesn't respond, but I assume that's because his arms hurt too badly to move them.

It's in these moments that I really wish he would talk.

I bring the wet washcloth from earlier to his temple and as lightly as I can, clean the dried blood away.

I have to very awkwardly ask if I can remove his shirt so I can clean there. He nods and half helps me get his arms through the sleeves and I take it off of him.

There are so many dark bruises covering his torso, and his skin is all swollen and red.

I can make out distinctive fists and shoes where they punched and kicked him.

This makes me snap.
"Fucking hell. When I see those bastards again I'm going to murder them." I say, fighting to keep my voice calm. It's not working too well.

He shakes his head.
"Dan, they hurt you. I can't just let them get away with it." I say.
He raises his hands to sign.
No.

I dab away at one of the bigger cuts on his chest and he winces.
I sigh.

When I'm done I find one of my jumpers and help him put it on.

"I'll go get you something for the pain. I'll be right back." I tell him.

In the kitchen I make him a cup of tea and I grab 2 ibruprofen.

When I get back up to him he's very sleepy. He barely gets to take the meds before he's asleep again.

I know what happens though when he goes to bed before he takes his sleeping medication so I don't let him for too long.

He looks so cute, but so very fragile. I just want to hold him close to me and kiss him. I want him to feel the same way for me that I feel for him.

But that is totally unrealistic.

A/N

This chapter was total shit but I wanted to publish again :)
I will go back and edit this entire story as I haven't yet, but for now I'm not bothering with it..

Also, I'm having major writer's block so after the next chapter (which is already done) I have no idea when I'll publish next..

Have a good day peoples♡
~Rowan