Searching For Pluto | ✔️

F-boy

Insecurity...
Insecurity gave you the key
And said it opened a door to a new world.
A new world glamorized by buff jocks
And unafraid skinny dorks.
/
You... kinda became the latter.
Skinny af mofo you are.
But - girls digged the height,
Or the voice,
Or the lack a fear,
Because besides all the misogynistic behaviour
They still wanted you.
It's the flirting,
It's the eye contact,
It's the hugs... Too?
I don't know.
/
You want to say it's fun
And that's the truth - it is.
You make it seem like it comes from a good place - because at first, it does.
I mean,
There's nothing wrong with wanting to make girls think they're beautiful.
But it gets confusing for them,
It starts to break them when you don't reply to them,
When you start the one word replies
And neglect the chaos without a goodbye...
/
It gets to them.
/
And it's because it all got to you.
The insecurity.
It was built upon the need to prove your worth to friends
That you were in fact worth it in the end -
That girls would want you as you played pretend.
/
Self-deception...
It's grows quite quickly;
Sparks like a wildfire.
Except no one notices.
Oh,
Only you end up noticing
The monster you're turning into
But still - you consciously fuel the flame:
Smiles,
Euphoric touches,
Blushes,
Sweet reactions -
/
Why do you still fuel the flame?
/

Change is only for the brave.