Protecting the Chosen.

chapter 11, food and needles.

Killian.

My knees were pressed against my chest, my head resting on top covered by my arms, taking slow deep breaths I sat there. Orion was still asleep next to me, radiating body heat into my back. Seeing him again made my heart beat faster, but fear pushed the happiness away. I had failed him, made him suffer by staying alive and not letting him get a new protector. I wanted to die so many times but I couldn't, the thought of hurting him was even stronger than the desire to end my suffering. Now I was back, but in no condition to full fill my purpose. I was useless, he doesn't need a burden like me dragging him down. grinding my teeth I could feel tears starting to escape and fall down. I hate feeling weak, feeling useless like I know I am. i couldn't shake the thought and feelings of me. 'Killian, breath. It is not true. None of it.' I gasped for air and felt Orion wrap his arms around me. 'please, believe me.' I nodded. I heard him sigh behind me. all he was doing was holding me, but the immense joy i felt, was surreal. it fit perfectly, shaking i placed my hands over his and could swear his heartbeat just sped up. A small chuckle ruffled my hair and i almost smiled, i was to lost in thought and joy.

The door opened and a familiar face walked in. His bright red hair catching my attention, it bounced on top of his head with each step he took. The last time I saw him it was dark so I never noticed how deep green his eyes were. Smiling he walked over and put down two plates of food on the bedside table. Orion was deep in thought and didn't even see him come in, the sound from the plate hitting the table woke him and made him jolt upright. 'Cal! You startled me.' He grumbled a bit. The elf just laughed and pointed towards the plates. 'I bring food, so be nice!' pouting he crossed his arms. Narrowing my eyes I slowly moved further away from him in my bed. It was an reflex I didn't even knew I was doing till my back hit the wall next to my bed. 'Ah, when am I not nice?' Orion flashed him a small smile before looking back over at me. His expression changing into a frown. Getting up from his chair he put a hand on Cal's? shoulder and thanked him. 'I will be back later, some things happened in the past few days that I need to catch you up on.' He started walking out but before he could Orion stopped him. 'Something bad happen?' turning around Cal shook his head. 'Not really bad, but definitely weird.' Tapping his chin he spun on his heel and walked out. 'Okay then?' sighing he walked over to me, the bed dipping when he sat down. 'Always an airhead.' I barely heard his mumbling, my eyes focused on the plate. I could hear him chuckling as he took it and placed it before me. 'I hope Damian didn't make this, for your taste buds sake. But from the looks of it Cal made it, so dig in.' I don't know if it was the fact I hadn't eaten a real meal in a long time or that Cal was a great cook but my mouth was watering at the sight. Taking a small bite I almost moaned in pure bliss. Orion was observing me, small smile playing on his lips. 'Like it?' I just nodded and grabbed another bite. Within no time my plate was empty and stomach full, a sensation that was so foreign to me. 'Ah it is good to see you are eating!' Kita's cheerful voice rang as she walked in. 'Don't feel sick? You ate quite a bit.' i shook my head and eyed her as she moved around. 'that's good, I hope you don't mind but I need to take that blood sample now.' I tensed, my body went rigid. She noticed and motioned for Orion to calm me. 'It will just take a second, she won't hurt you.' My eyes shifted to him, but as soon as she moved my eyes were back on her. I saw the syringe, it was empty. The logical part of my brain knew she would be taking my blood and not put something in it, but my fear of the small object won. Panting I gripped the sheets, shaking my head to try to clear my blurring vision. Soft hands cupped my face. 'Killian, just look at me okay? Look in my eyes. Focus on that.' I did, locking my eyes with his, observing the green specks through the blue. But I still felt it, the needle going in. I choked, I couldn't breathe. 'Kita!' he was panicking, I could hear it in his voice. 'I'm already out, put him down!' my back hit something soft, frantically I searched for his eyes again, the black in the corner of my eyes growing bigger until it was completely dark. Hearing Orion call out to me made me take a breath.

Blinking didn't ease the darkness away so I closed my eyes.

Vaguely I heard them talking. It sounded like an apology coming from Kita, explaining she had no idea I would react this severe.

Orion's hands were still cupping my face and his thumbs drawing circles over my cheeks. His forehead was pressed against mine. 'you're okay, I'm sorry.'

Nodding was the only response I could give him. cursing at myself for showing such weakness, I knew he suspected that I was a bit fucked up after all those years. Having it shoved into his face so soon was not the ideal way of confirming his suspicions. Good job Killian, just fucking great.

'What did they do to you Killi?' I gripped his shirt and nuzzled my head into the crook of his neck. I never intended to respond and after a while I think he got that. Sighing he just ran his fingers though my hair. 'i'm hungry.'

A slight chuckle left his lips as he pulled away. 'Again? I will go get some food, be right back.' He smiled back at me as he went through the door. Groaning I fell back against the pillow. My thoughts went towards Orion's eyes, the deep but still bright blue mixed with the small flecks of green. The instant I locked mine into his I calmed down. just like when we were younger. Someone would pick on Orion and I would go bat shit crazy defending him, resulting in the other people in the hospital if he wouldn't step in, telling me to calm down. and I would, in an instant. Would they change? If I told him about everything would the spark disappear, go dull? It was a stupid thought, no matter what I did he would never look at me with disgust or anger. And I did a lot of stupid things that would piss off a normal person to the point of chocking the life out of me. Either he has amazing restraint or he just doesn't care, the latter sounding ridiculous even to me. Seeing him and holding him, even with all the pain I had endured these years... it was worth it. He was safe, had friends and a place to live without fear. I did my job, even from far away. It would be a while till he got back, and i knew they still needed the blood sample. the syringe was close, Kita dropped it and forgot to take it away. i reached out and grabbed it, straining my muscles. first i just held it in my hand, til i stopped shaking. It was something i had never done before but by the indents of needle marks on my skin it was easy to just plunge it in without thinking and draw the blood out. panting by then i ripped it out and placed it back with a hard thump that was heard. kita came in slowly eyeing me as she noticed Orion was gone. i gestured to the syringe that was now filled with the red liquid. shocked she came closer and took it. 'I'm sorry, i know you need it. but i wont let anyone else but me do it.' it was hard keeping my voice strong. she nodded and offered me a smile. 'I understand, this is very helpful. if i ever need more i will remember that.' nodding i looked away, i was done with the conversation and exhausted using the amount of strength i needed doing that seemingly small act. 

Pic is of Cal(callhoun)