Agent 454 {Sequel to School Bus Lou}

Chapter 11

Chapter 11

After being bombarded by questions and apologies I finally have gotten away from all those people. It's too overwhelming to be with them. I did tell Louis I would converse but I gave up on that one. I mean, they are all just overcrowding and clinging to me.

So, here I sit in the kitchen... Alone.

I am forming words with letters that were brought over by Niall.

Turns out Niall adopted a kid. Yah I know right. Probably the only one I want to see at the moment. She doesn't talk and just likes to play. She has blonde hair and brown eyes. Odd combo I know. She's only three and they adopted her from some teen mom 3 years ago.

Oh yah! They meaning Niall and his husband-

"Harry are you going to come out of the kitchen?" Louis comes in cutting me off from my thoughts.

"No I'm good.." I mutter forming a new word.

"C'mon babe... Come out and talk to your friends-"

"They are not my friends.. They were but.. We are strangers now." I mutter putting two words together on the counter.

"Why don't you... Come out and make friends." Louis says standing beside me.

"I'm good thanks anyway." I mumble putting more letters together.

"Uhm.. You can't just sit here playing with Vivy's toys." Louis says rubbing my arm slightly.

Oh yah. Vivian is Niall's daughter.

"But-"

"Cmon baby.. For me?" Louis asks.

I shake my head and his body droops a bit.

"Please.. You only have to talk to me then.. Okay?" Louis asks.

"Fine.." I mumble.

"Okay I will be back." Louis says leaving the room.

I look down at my sentence and it reads:

Written in these walls

... Simple but holds a lot of meaning ...

Louis comes back and kisses my hair.

"What does written in these walls mean to you?" Louis asks me.

I shrug not wanting to answer and Louis puts his arms around me to pick me up bridal style. I hold onto him and he walks me back to the living room.

Everyone stays quiet only a low whisper is shared amongst the three of them.

"Louis please.. I don't want to talk.. I just want to stay in the safety of my room." I beg.

"It's okay Harry you have me." Louis kisses my shoulder as he sits down with me on his lap.

"It's otay... I'm shy too." Vivian whispers patting my knee.

I hear an 'aww' come from Niall and I look down at her.

"How do you do it?" I whisper back. She smiles softly before pulling herself up on the couch and sitting beside Louis and me. She pulls my head down so it's resting on the arm rest and she plays with my hair.

"I don't." She answers, "I like your hair."

"I like yours too." I mumble wrapping my finger around her soft blond hair.

"I like yours better.. It's curly." She mumbles.

My hair is now 10 centimeters long and has been curling ever since it reached a full 6 centimeters. It has also been getting quite thick too.

"No.. Yours is pretty and long too." I smile up at her and she pokes my cheek.

"You have a dimple." She smiles.

"I do??" I say surprised.

"Yep!" She says poking it some more.

I haven't smiled in what seems like ages.

It feels nice.

"Are you scared of the big people?" Vivian asks.

"I.. I dunno." I mumble.

"Don' worry bout my papa and dada.. They are good." She says quietly, "I promise."

"Yea?" I ask.

"Yes! Pinky promise." She holds her pinky out for me and I wrap my big one around her small one.

Someone hands her some animal crackers and she feeds me ones making me giggle.

"What animal did you give me?" I ask.

"A lion!" She growls and I fake scared.

"Not a lion!!!" I gasp.

"Yes it will eat you up!" She bites the air.

"Nooo!!!" I whine. "Don't let it eat me!!"

"Here eat a giraffe it has special powers to keep you safe!" She puts another in my mouth and I chew it quickly then swallow.

"Thank heavens!" I say putting my hand over my heart and she giggles.

"Isn't he.." I hear Louis' voice. I look over at him and he's staring at me.

"Uhmm.. W-what's going on.." I whisper.

"Nothing.. You're just.. You look so happy." Louis smiles.

"Yah I have always wanted kids of my own. Have a large family, hopefully one will look like me... You know what I mean." I say before looking back at Vivy.

Louis *POV*

"Yah I have always wanted kids of my own. Have a large family, hopefully one will look like me... You know what I mean."

I feel my whole body go on auto pilot.

He wants kids of his own. That he created... Of fucking course. The one thing that I can't give him is the key to his happiness.

Way to go Lou!

Ugh.

I watch Harry and Vivian get along so well and I just can't look at it anymore. He's so happy. He shows emotions.

I stand up from my spot shifting Harry onto the couch before I walk to the washroom. Niall's calls of concern fills my ears.

I quickly drop to the cold bathroom floor and let my tears go.

He doesn't love me...

I can't give him kids...

I couldn't be there for him to tell him that;

It's okay to get scared at night.. Because the dark is a scary place... And it's okay to want to cry and that crying is the bodies way of letting go... And that it's okay to let others help you and that if you want to look under your bed before sleep because you are afraid there is a monster underneath.. It's okay.