In Too Deep

Chapter 9

"What do you mean?" My Mum's face had turned pale after I told her the truth about Jai. I know that this was hard for her to accept, but it's what needed to happen. Jai needed help whether he wanted it or not.

"Exactly what I said. Jai cuts himself. I took all of his blades away, but that only caused him to have a panic attack and now I don't know what to do." I explained. My Mum pulled me into a hug in response.

"I know you blame yourself right now, but you can't do that sweetie." She told me. "Jai has always been different, more sensitive than you or Beau. To be honest, I should have saw this coming a long time ago. Thanks for telling me, Luke."

"What now?" I asked her. She smiled up at me.

"Try to be patient with him."
-
"You told Mum..." Jai stated after he basically tried to knock my door down in the process of coming in. "How could you do that to me? Do you have any idea how much I hated myself when she was practically crying in my room because of me?"

"I did what I had to." I stared him in the eyes as I said that. He looked away, not being able to hold eye contact.

"No you didn't. I'm perfectly fine Luke. You just worry too much." Jai argued, staring at his shoes. I frowned. It was almost like Jai didn't even realize he had a huge problem. That's what this was. A huge problem.

"If you were fine then you wouldn't feel the need to slice your wrists apart." Jai flinched at my word choice, but that didn't go unnoticed by me.

"I don't slice them apart..." Jai mumbled, barely above a whisper. I rolled my eyes at him and grabbed his wrist tightly in one hand and yanked his sleeve up quickly with the other.

"What's this then? There are scars everywhere Jai." It was really bad to even look at. It was obvious to me how bad this truly was. There were deep, raised white lines as well as red and pink and grey scars littering his entire wrist. I was almost positive that his other arm was in the exact same condition.

"I...it's nothing Luke." Jai looked away, but I could clearly see the tears welling up in his eyes. I placed my hands on his shoulders and forced him to look at me.

"You have a problem, Jai. It's okay to admit that and get help." I soothed my crying brother. We may be twins, but Jai had always been the more sensitive one.

"I don't deserve help, Luke. Not anymore. I'm a horrible person and I'm always so mean to you and Beau without meaning to." Jai cried.

"Easy there. It's okay. We're brothers, fights are going to happen. Plus, sometimes Beau really deserves what he gets as much as he teases you." I admitted. "Just stop crying. You're going to be okay, now. I'm here for you now."

"What if I can't do it?" Jai spoke up. "What if I can't stop cutting? Would you still love me if I became a complete failure?"

"Jai," I whispered, my heart breaking at how vulnerable he sounded. "You're my twin brother. I'll love you no matter what you do."

"I still don't want to be a disappointment." He muttered.

"You won't be. You have me now, and I'll never let you give up on yourself ever again. That's a promise."