Insanity

Is innocence a sin ?

Credence POV

"It's always going to be okay when you're with me, Credence, I'm protecting you." The words echoed in my mind, replacing the previous word. I wanted to feel his touch. I wanted him to whisper in my ear forever, I wanted to be by his side as long as I could.
He promised me he'd help me, and he did.
I don't know what happened, or how or even why. I just knew that I wanted to touch him.

My lips landed on his, I closed my eyes and memorized the feeling as much as I could, he flinched at first but did not move. After few seconds, I opened my eyes and broke the contact.

I just realized what I'd done, I feared that he would run away and never talk to me again. But I knew how his lips felt on mine and I would never forget that feeling.

His touch erased everything. The bad memories, Ma, the wounds, the pain, the anger and even my past. His touch made me feel special, it made me feel like it was only us.

But I knew he couldn't feel that way, because who could love me ?

Percival POV

Before I could do anything, I had his lips on mine. I flinched, because it was the first time he made a move towards me. But I didn't move, because it felt surprisingly good after all this time without kissing anyone. I didn't move, because his lips felt like they were made for mine.

Yet, even if he didn't mean to kiss me. A lot of emotions passed through his lips and traveled to my soul. It felt like a connection. I could feel every and each one of his fears, and even his desires.

Wait.

What ?

He backed off.

What was wrong with me ? Was I fucking mad ? Disabled ?
How could I think things like that ?
I...

The look in his eyes made me shut up.
There was fear, but his cheeks were pink, probably from embarrassment.
And there was this innocence, that innocence that struck me every time. I could bet that he didn't know that kissing a man when you were a boy was kind of forbidden. I could bet that he didn't mean anything by this kiss, that he just felt that it was what he should do and that he just went for it.
And I didn't know why I knew so much about him already, it kind of scared me but I had to deal with it. I thought it was because he was always so transparent with his feelings, so easy to read.

"Credence... I..."

"I'm sorry, Mr Graves, I don't know what-"

"Credence-"

He shut his eyes tightly, he was shaking.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to-"

"Credence. Please."

He opened his eyes, they were full of tears.

"First, call me Percival from now on, there is no use for this 'Mister' thing. Second, it's alright Credence. I know you're probably confused with everything that's happening to you, so it's okay, really. You should just know that a kiss between two males in the middle of a street, as deserted as it can be, is quite unconventional. And it could compromise me, so, please, just not in the street next time."
I chuckled and ruffled his hair.