Paralyzed

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Victoria

Past: 13

There are a lot of things weighing on my mind. I don't know what to think of my life anymore. This is all new. All too gentle. All too happy. All too accepting. I can't fathom how I suddenly can adjust so quickly and act natural around everyone. Nobody likes a depressing person, but in my case, I think it's plausible.

"You're not depressing even if you tried."

"Because, I actually take into consideration of what others may feel. Unlike someone."

"Honest, cold hard truth. If you can't handle it, then your life is a lie."

"Wow, very deep and poetic of you."

"I'd say I try, but I don't."

"Yes you do."

"Fine, maybe I do a little."

Our pointless conversation closes as I continue to scan the forest of trees. Hours pass by and I still haven't even caught the arrogant vampire's scent. The sun gravitating towards the rolling hills of luscious green grass that the breeze brushes its fingers through. The sun has set long ago, signaling the night life to arise into the darkness. Small, soft lights appear before me. I watch in awe, the different assortment of colors in the illuminant shine. I can't help but to lean in closer, as if I am called upon its attention like a siren or a light house located at the edge the deep seas.

As I get a closer look, I can see that they are not just lights, but in fact, fairies. The power of their magic is the light. The color of each light must represent the type of magic they choose to practice. Red, green, blue, yellow, purple. A yellow one floats up to me. By instinct I hold out my hand and she delicately sits down on her hip inside my palm. Her soft, small features stare up at me full of curiosity.

My inner self pushes forward; I let her out of wonder of why she would want to see the magical creature. I sit and watch the fairy's expression turn from one of curiosity to one of realization and awe. She stumbles as she flutters up and flies over to a clearing surrounded by trees. I have no choice but to follow her, because the beast within me guides me to go wherever the fairy goes.

The fairy stops in the middle of the round clearing of trees and cups her hands around the corners of her mouth. My animals' ears perk up and a surge of pride fills my being as the sound of her voice. The sound of a soft melody created by strings. The winds fingers brushing along the strings of long grass. My curiosity is spiked as all of the other fairies from before and many more emerge from behind the trees, hidden under the blades of grass, the branches of the tall trees, from behind leaves, everywhere. The soft glow of so many colors, brighten the area. The beast inside me eggs me on as the yellow fairy from before kneels down onto the grass, followed by all the others. My eyes widen with surprise. Usual I'd be uncomfortable in situations like these, but this feels so natural.

Like muscle memory, I nod and begin to kneel down onto one knee. Not both. The yellow fairy flutters towards me along with a male fairy glowing red. She nods to me with a wide smile and kisses my cheek. The red fairy slowly takes her place as she backs away. My heart bursts from an unknown feeing and I feel a tug in my head, like a slight headache. The male fairy leans his forehead against the top of the bridge of my nose. My creature, my inner self, my other half opens a link and silently communicates with him. I watch the exchange intrigued. Like the yellow fairy, he nods to me respectively then backs away. An unexplainable feeling tugs within me and my beast. I take stand, nodding back.

"I didn't really mean to say it."

I jump at the sudden sound of a deep voice from directly behind me, breaking me from my mesmerized and confused daze. I glare at Carson with my hand over my chest.

"Goddess, Carson."

He smiles sheepishly, his head lowered, his eyes giving me an apologetic look before focusing on a small twig he kicks.

"Sorry."

I sigh, looking back behind me where the fairies used to be, only to my disappointment, I see they've gone. Bummed, I move to sit down onto the moss that covers the earth full of unanswered questions. Carson follows suite and slides down a tree near by on the edge of the rounded clearing.

"I wasn't created," I watch him curiously as he picks a dandelion from the loose dirt. I sit back and silently listen.

"My father believed very strongly in keeping the royal blood line sterile."

My eyes widen, he's a royal? He doesn't really seem anything like it. But, I guess if you look at him with the idea in mind. He holds himself like one. Argues like one. Eats like one...okay maybe not. I haven't seen his eyes or his power, but I'm sure it's as awestruck as I can imagine. Maybe that's why I feel so drawn to him. He's somewhat like me.

"Or like me...strikingly handsome."

"Do you have to ruin the moment!"

His soft, playful laughter  echoes in the back of my head.

"He forced my mother into having his child while she was still human. Then changed her when she was at the brink of death after my birth." His fingers carefully caress the flowers petals.

"Werewolves have mates. All shifters have a person they're destined to be with. They can choose if they want to be with them forever or not. They have a choice if they want to go further with their rightful mate or reject them and get a new mate if something goes wrong. Only things won't be as good as it would have with the rightful mate. They die when the bond breaks. Vampires, we don't have that luxury-a bond. Nobody creates us the one that's supposed to complete us. Who would, we're dead anyway.

"We have to fend for ourselves, just like humans and search for someone who'd accept us for the monsters we are. We're forced to move on and live if our heart dies nor can we find someone else. There isn't someone waiting for me who'll already love and appreciate me at first sight, like you and James. Harrison always had it all. A family, life, the girl...I lead her to her death. I know it was wrong of me to call him by the name she always did. I don't know why I did."

Silent tears begin to silently flow down his cheeks. I hurt for him because I kind of understand his story. Although he's leaving a lot out, I can't help but feel like I already know. He doesn't have to tell me. I creep up to him and wrap my arms around his shoulders. He holds onto me, dropping his head onto my own shoulder. I smile a little as tears pool in my eyes.

"No matter. You're not the only one who's done horrible things. I have a feeling you didn't do willingly. I've done a few things I'm not entirely proud of either." He's not just a royal, but a prince. My best friend is a prince. Who'd have thought?

"Thanks for being my friend, Vick." I smile bright, looking into his tearful eyes. My fingers move to wipe them away.

"I wouldn't rather have it any other way."

Carson smiles at me and pulls me tightly against him. My heart aches as I hug him back, both of us crying for unknown reasons. All he knows is that I'm James' mate. I know he's told me something he's not proud of, and a sliver of the secret to Harrison and his relationship, but I'd like to keep it that way. Because once they know, they may never coming back.