luke hemmings imagines

#imagine: the hate caught up to you. but you didn't let it stop you.

#Imagine.

(Trigger Warning.)

.

YOUR POV.


How did I end up this way? Why did everyone hate me? What have I done too deserve this hate? Was what they were saying about me true? Am I fat? I never say any of theses insecurity's before. Luke may tell me that they are just jealous of me for dating him, but I can't help but feel like they are right. Maybe this is a sign that I don't belong in this word. Maybe this is my time too leave. 



Would anyone miss me? Maybe Luke would for a few months, but I am not worth tears they said, I'm not pretty enough for Luke, they said. I'm fat, they said. Why was I letting all of this hate get too me now? After 2 years of dating the man I love so much, I thought his fans would be over us dating. Will they ever be over us? Maybe, once I take one step off this building it will all be over. Maybe I can finally be happy again without ever having too worry about the hate and pain. 



But, if I just take this one step off the building, doesn't this mean they won? Isn't this their plan all along? To make me feel like all of their hate comments will get too me and I will just pass my life away? Do they think I'm not strong enough to handle it? Do they think I am no good for Luke? They may not support me and luke together, but looking back at all our great moments in our relationship, I realized he was the reason I stayed so grounded, without him I am lifted into the air.



This isn't the way I want to end my life, I want to end it with luke, I want luke in my life for as long as I live, and jumping off this building won't give me my dream. 


Taking one step, I was off the edge of the building, on the way home too luke, my beautiful, kind-hearted boyfriend who I love so much.

"i need help" you say as you walk in the doors of your shared home with luke.

"with what?" luke said growing concerned and rushing towards me.

"the hate, it caught up to me, i was so close to ending my life because i thought that was a sign for me to leave. i almost left you, i almost left the man of my life who makes me happy. i almost left because your fans told me to. why luke? why am i a target?" you say while walking towards him and just resting your head on his chest while holding him tightly.

"baby, listen to me. the hate is just that, hate. they hate you because you have what they can never have. they know you're in my life forever and that's what makes them send hate to you because I'm not just "theirs" whatever that means. please don't try to end your life because of what those people are saying to you or about you, if you need help i am here for you always. because if you haven't noticed already you make me very happy and i would be very upset if something happened to you." luke says while hugging you back and gently rubbing his hands up and down your back.

"i think this is a lesson. i will get stronger. i will get confident enough so the hate will just push by me. i will come to you if i need it. and i love you with everything i got." you say while lifting your head up and every so slightly kissing luke on the lips.

"i love you very much as well." 



Maybe this is a sign. Maybe this is just the start of the hate getting too me. But I have too realize that the hate comments mean nothing to me, because I have someone who loves me for me, and I shouldn't change that for anyone. If I'm happy with myself, then maybe the fans should be happy with this person. I'm me.

..

hello, I'm back from the dead aka college life. (i have completed my two years of the hell of a program and doing a work term on wednesday.) 

so idk how much ill be able to post on the weekdays as my work schedule is monday-friday from 8:30-5:30 but two good news about this work term is that it's paid (fuck yes money), and i get weekends off. :) so hopefully on the weekends ill post a few imagines here and there. 

also:

kind of changed this a little bit from when i first wrote it.

but i hope you liked it.

was kinda triggering at the beginning but then happy. 

k bye