Mastering Wren

Ch.39 Not Hungry for Food

Not Hungry for Food

The charity-business is paused for the week as Theo and Alex chase back that money owed to them. I sit down on my couch the next Friday afternoon, car keys in my fiddling hands as I watch Mr. Fox and Puddy Caita tumbling before me in a play-fight match of who-can-get-to-the-food-bowl-first.

I didn't put in much, but enough to keep them happy and not to throw up in my car. I look at the clock, 5.50pm. It was still too early. So I reminisce about the week as my cats eat and explore the cat cages that I've set down and opened for them to inspect with their inquisitive feline senses.

I remember waking up very sober that Monday morning. And I had been furious.

Gosh, I remember how I couldn't believe I really had forgiven Theo that quickly. But then, that morning I hadn't completely disregarded him either. He lay with me for over two hours just spooning me from behind, apologising.

Eventually I gave in and agreed to wear the ring as long as he slowed right down and gave me a bit of space to breathe. To process the events. I knew Theo didn't mean any harm, but he did cause some over the past few weeks.

So, Theo gave me the week off, said his father and him would sort out the charity money. They knew it'd be easy to get the money back as she was no longer an employee when the money was put in her account.

So, I spent all week doing yoga, watching T.V. drama and talking to Theo over the phone. I didn't let him into my apartment. No. Fuck that.

I wanted to give him some consequences of his own and now, five days later I was ready to see him again. To start fresh. He invited me over to his mansion. He told me to bring the cats, let them explore a bigger territory.

I agreed.

All I knew so far was that our private dinner was at 6.30pm and I didn't want to be early. This morning I got a text from him that the money was refunded to Theo's charity account, so I assumed work was on for next week.

And now we would start fresh with a dinner. I was both nervous, excited and a little apprehensive.

Yeah, I missed him – but I couldn't shake that hurt feeling. It was always nagging at me, in the back of my mind. Even though I logically understood why everything happened... my heart refused to mend completely.

I was really scared if it didn't, I wouldn't be able to go through with us.

If the damage was too much, I couldn't just move on. In fact, I don't think we'd work together again. I was too paranoid about being betrayed.

But tonight was his last chance and I was going to make that known to him.

Even though I loved him and he loved me. My sanity was important too.

Short term we might be okay, long term I wasn't so sure.

I look at my phone. 6pm.

"Alright, kitty cats," I stand up and crouch by the cages, sticking my hands through the bars so they run in and try to attack my soft, defenceless fingers. Mr. Fox never stuck his claws out on me, but Puddy Caita is far more rough and lethal, so I make quick retreats before he tears me to shreds, "Oh, I love you both, so much," once they are in, I close the doors, strategically quick, "It's time to go to a cat-heaven playground, like a cat Disney land. You ready, boys?"

I pick up both cages – or I try to and I nearly drop Puddy.

"Mr. Fatty," I whisper as I slowly place the cage back down. Perhaps it was good they'd both have a chance to exercise, "One at a time then."